"So are you into hurting people or do you like getting smacked around in bed?"
Thanks, Fifty Shades of Rapey Nonsense! Thank you, mainstream media! With your help, the plethora of kinks, fetishes and fantasies included under the BDSM umbrella became synonymous with sadomasochism and "rough sex". That's not what those four letters mean to me. Even though the S and M are still there, it's not about pain and violence. Quite the opposite. I focus on the D/s
There are many reasons why I choose to take the power given to me in a session. Spoiler: joy from inflicting pain is not one of them.
So why do I Domme?
Because I am kinky
And I have always been kinky. It's always been a part of me, that odd attraction to power-play in an intimate setting. Even before I knew what sex is, oddly kinky scenes would float up in my mind, exciting me at the idea of bondage and physical control.
Over the years I've tried to tame the need or ignore it. I can, but why would I? There is so much more to domination that just filling a need. It gives me so much more.
(Very old photo by @mrlightning)
Because it's empowering
Domination is empowering to the Domme. That's quite obvious. To me, there's nothing quite like that feeling I get when my submissive looks up at me with adoration and surrender. But D/s isn't only empowering to whoever is on top, but also to whoever is on the bottom. The ability to give complete trust and relinquish physical control is liberating and empowering. I know because I checked. But that's a topic for a different post.
Because it's creative
The human body is a musical instrument. Bondage is like knitting on the body. The movements of limbs and shivers of muscles, the twitching of nerves and the beautiful noises a human produces are an artwork. A unique creation that can never be recreated, only expanded upon.
Because it's therapeutic
A D/s session can be an intense experience. It can bring things out in you that you never knew were there. In my past experience, working as a professional Domme, I noticed that such intensity, stimulation and intimacy can take people places. I've had submissives cry, laugh hysterically and even just talk about things they never would dare say elsewhere. And it's all part of it.
A Domme is often not only a partner for sexual or semi-sexual activity, but someone with whom you share a level of intimacy that can be deeper than any romantic bond. Mostly because of the intensity and depth of experiences shared.
To me, there's something therapeutic about domination. A session with my beloved submissive is like a religious ritual or some form of meditation for me. It feels me with a sense of peace, and the control I feel in the session accompanies me into my life.
Because I can
Because I have been blessed with the power and ability to take a submissive to a wonderful place in their mind, and give their body a unique experience that is unlike a chemical drug. But natural. And since I can, I do.
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Note: All images from Pixabay unless otherwise indicated.