Daily Dose of Sultnpapper 03/24/18> So there are some low flying helicopters … big deal.

It never amazes me on what people will post on FaceBook and that people believe the crap even though the source of the information has no credible source. I came home from work Friday and there was a helicopter flying over our place, my wife happened to be sitting out in the yard with the dog enjoying the sunshine. The first words out of her mouth are, “that’s an FBI helicopter.”

“Really? An FBI helicopter? What makes that an FBI helicopter?” I asked. It just looks like a helicopter to me, so I’m interested in her explanation. “That helicopter has been around all this week flying the area and according to who ever runs “Spring Happenings” on FaceBook it is an undercover FBI helicopter”, she proceeds to tell me. Not just this black and white one with a red stripe but there is a second one that is white with red that is also been around all week as well. “It has also been flying real low too.”, she says.

So evidently the frequent sightings and flying low makes this an FBI helicopter?

“Have you ever thought that it might be flying low because we live close to Hooks?” I asked her. Hooks is a local airport that is less than a mile away as the crow flies. They also have two hangars there that are helicopter repair facilities and they also have a helicopter pilot training lessons outfit that is based out of Hooks airport. There is also a helicopter refueling station across the street from Hooks that I’ve been told sells fuel really cheap compared to the fuel at Hooks and the big airport, Houston Intercontinental, which is about 15 miles south of us. None of those facts made any difference to her.

“There is something big going on around here, they’re saying it has to do with prostitution, child kidnapping and sex trafficking.” the wife tells me. “Just who are ‘they’ that are saying this?”, I ask. “Spring Happenings”, is the answer I got.
Since I gave up on FaceBook over two years ago I guess I am just out of the loop on what is going on in our home town.

Thank God that my wife has Spring Happenings to keep us informed. Having been in Austin all week where there really was over 500 federal agents running around looking for the Austin bomber, I can see how this sex trafficking stuff could really be important enough to have two FBI helicopters here looking for some bad guys running a couple massage parlors on the main roads near us. (That was sarcasm, how do I put sarcasm in print?)

Yes, there have been a couple massage parlors in the area where it has been reported that you could get a massage with, as these Asian women say, “you want happy endings? I can give you happy endings.” The local law enforcement has busted them for soliciting sexual favors, or as the law says; prostitution. Just maybe there are some sex slaves working in these places, but I don’t; in any way, shape, or form, believe that FBI is using helicopters as part of their investigation, if they are investigating these places at all. Local law enforcement seems to have a pretty good handle on getting to the “happy endings” conversation. Those FBI guys could walk right in these places just like the local cops and drop their pants and lay on the table. They could see a hell of a lot more from that vantage point than several hundred feet up in the air from a helicopter.

To add some credibility to the Spring Happenings the wife told me that someone ran a check on the identification “numbers” on the helicopter and the black & white with the red stripe has been used in other areas by the FBI. I’m sure the FBI undercover helicopters have their past assignments listed online, give me a break. I would be more inclined to believe the story if they said they hacked into the FBI computer system and stole the information, but not that they found it online.

The only good part about Spring Happenings and these crazy ass stories is that when the time comes that my father in law kicks the old bucket, I can point to these stories and say “let’s get the hell out of here.” We used to be way “out in the county” and now we have been sucked up by suburbia, I miss the country way of life. Once he is gone there isn’t any reason to stay in this area any longer and that is something we do agree on, the wife and I. The kids have a different opinion but they are not running the show, the just get a ticket to watch the performance.

So keep on the Spring Happenings FB page honey, we need to be informed, and since I had a rough week at work with all the travel and driving, I think I might just get me one of those “hot oil massages” today.
Happy endings,
@sultnpapper

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