I feel trapped. It might be the fact that I'd betrayed my countrymen in the War of Hibiscus three hundred years ago and been sentenced to having my soul trapped in a gargoyle.
But that's ancient history. Today, I escape. The main reason is that the humans are thinking of demolishing my castle and opening a shopping complex. While we gargoyles are ugly, I think shopping complexes can beat us.
No touch ups for us, no siree, they'll put tremendous amounts of goo on themselves but nothing to take care of the crack I developed while arguing with the wind.
Bellicose the Belligerent, the gargoyle next to me gave me an idea to plot my escape. Gargoyles can't escape because we can't move, but the soul trapped inside by an incantation can be released and given a flesh form. I needed a witch for this. The first thing you think of when thinking of witch, is that old bitch- wind. I had to convince her somehow to help me. But what could I give the almighty wind?
Bellicose was ranting one day about the big wind chime in our tower and how annoying it is. Wind dropped by and became very emotional about the chime. She hates it. She wants to remove it but the moment she goes near it , it starts its cacophony, so she can't do anything. What she needs is a gargoyle come to life, who can brave the noise and destroy the big chime.
I put this proposal to her. She chewed the idea for a while, while blowing the toupee off a bald guy, and relented.
She is here now and casting the incantation. Finally, Gary the gargoyle is free. I am so happy.
I run to the fountain to take a look at myself.
That witch! I see the reflection of a woman with a scar where my crack had been. The witch was full of mischief.
After destroying the big chime to honour our pact, I set forth to explore human life.
Humans have this concept of money to buy things and for that you need a job.
I am a happily employed as a wind chime maker.
I nominate @mctiller and @dflo to make an entry for comedy open mic.