Welcome to Punday Monday!

If you’re new here, pull up a stool, order a pun-t, and get to know some of the regulars! I’m your puntender, @improv.
You can jump in any time, and if you aren’t sure how to make a pun, here’s a handy dandy guide:
@improv/puns-and-prizes-learn-to-pun-easy-fun-anybody-can-be-a-hit-at-parties

If you’re an oldtimer, welcome back! Get to know some of the whippersnappers. Here, we have a craft brew for you, it creeps up on you. On the house:
(Back in my day, we didn’t have Tinder...if you wanted to swipe someone, you had to become a kidnapper.)

And since you’re an oldtimer, you might be interested in the results of our first annual best pun contest:
@freewritehouse/punday-monday-year-one-day-awards-ceremony

If you’re an any-timer, old or whipper, make sure you visit @freewritehouse! There you can meet fellow lovers of goofiness and find even more contests every week! We’re also now featured in the @steembasicincome contest round-up! Find more opportunities to win SBI there!

Hang on to your punderwear...

There’s no business like show business, so let’s show you the business we’re dealing with today!

Here’s last week’s post, and all the puns that are eligible to win this week are in the comments!
@improv/contest-punday-monday-61day-sbi-prizes-and-upvotes-also-laughter-is-the-best-prize

Rookie of the Week!

Goes to @professorbromide! I’m sure you’re not new to punning, but you’re new to me!

Pocket Choice awards

Every Friday, I put up a post to solicit audience favorites! They can vote on their favorites by sending POCKET to whomever they want to win. This week’s post is here:
@improv/pocket-friday-sbi-award-pocket-award-and-sbd-award

This week’s winner won a #steembasicincome share, because @freedomshift sponsors an SBI award for our #ccc qualified contest posts. Check out what the Curation Circle Creed is all about by visiting this link: The Honor Code - the Creed (Conditions and Limits Inside)

@professorbromide won @paul.atreides’ heart AND POCKET! He wins! New member of the winner’s circle. As I’m sure you all remember, we’re coming up on the big annual POCKET Choice awards ceremony. Just 4 more opportunities to be inducted! So, go find the biggest POCKET holders, and advocate for your pun to win! That post goes up on Fridays.

If you want to LEARN about POCKET, so you can participate in voting for your favorites, go ahead and check out this link
@improv/pocket-friday-for-punday-monday-here-s-a-way-to-use-your-pocket-and-get-a-laugh
You can also check out more info by @biophil, the creator of POCKET, and he’ll teach you. Check out his posts!

The folks in the POCKET Choice winner's circle are @professorbromide, @tcpolymath, @miniature-tiger, @lilygolightly, @chrisroberts, @stinawog, @f3nix, @doctorcrypto, @heroic15397, @littlescribe, @diebitch, @acolucky, @ablaze, and @paul.atreides.

and our grand prize...

Well, we got a little distracted with horoscope puns about Leos, even though I’m a Virgo, YOU GUYS, but...

The prize for best pun

Best pun of the entire week

Winner of our weekly SBI share giveaway

Best Overall Pun

DRUMROLL, PLEASE

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@antimetica! I’m still chuckling about the 1-2 punch that led us to cling to our piers because we’re doubled over with laughter!

Another big week with many puns! Hooray that many of our regulars are back! Hooray that new folks are finding us (SBI FTW!) Huzzah! Go read them all! It’s never past payout for a laugh attack.

And what prizes do they win, you ask?

Why, as usual, all the punsters got full strength upvotes on their submissions. (WORTH $0.02! So much value!)

Our category winners will each get to choose a post (of their own or someone else's) and I will give that post all the upvote I can (my two cents) and a @tipu tip (Actually worth 10 cents, folks!)!

AND they all get big, exciting SBI prizes!

(@professorbromide, you’ll get your POCKET Choice award from @freedomshift!)

This week's pun topic is...

Beer! (I’m drinking it)

As in,
“Hey, you’re a Canadian. After you have a Pilsner, what do you have?”
…
“I pee, eh?”

Perfect,

I'm so good at puns....

If you've never punned before, it might seem like magic! You can do it, too! Learn how in My Free How-To Guide on Punning!

Who do I nominate for @comedyopenmic’s comedy challenge?
Everyone participating in this week’s Punday! Go forth and comedy!

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And, as long as I have your attention… well, this place is probably already saturated with people who have referral codes for various “free money” things, but here are mine!

Coinbase: Cryptocurrency investment- https://www.coinbase.com/join/5929c0788331aa072d9e347e
(Hot tip, I buy BTC on pro.coinbase.com, then send it to bittrex to trade for Steem and send steem to my wallet here. It’s the most efficient way with the fewest fees I’ve found. If you’ve found better, let me know.)
Robinhood: investment platform buying/selling stocks- http://share.robinhood.com/brendaw92
Earn.com: small tasks for small rewards (need a business or .edu email) - http://earn.com/improv/referral/?a=qmk07e7tzua677hk
Mannabase: sign up for universal basic income distribution funded by cryptocurrency- https://www.mannabase.com/?ref=3984bea863
Swift: Yet another attempt at a UBI: https://www.swiftdemand.com/?referred_by=lochleinn