UPDATED PRIZE POOL, THANKS TO @CURIE! Punday Monday 67! Also Comedy Open Mic Round 33

Welcome to Punday Monday!

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If you’re new here, pull up a stool, order a pun-t, and get to know some of the regulars! I’m your puntender, @improv.
You can jump in any time, and if you aren’t sure how to make a pun, here’s a handy dandy guide:
@improv/puns-and-prizes-learn-to-pun-easy-fun-anybody-can-be-a-hit-at-parties

If you’re an oldtimer, welcome back! Get to know some of the whippersnappers, here, we have a drink so strong that I can guarantee it will make you dizzny. On the house:
(How can you tell the difference between Goofy and Pluto? By their pants.)

[-insert gif of Pluto panting, except don't because of copyright laws, -even though it's fair use under the parody act maybe? who knows. It's not worth the joke.-]

And since you’re an oldtimer, you might be interested in the results of our first annual best pun contest:
@freewritehouse/punday-monday-year-one-day-awards-ceremony

If you’re an any-timer, old or whipper, make sure you visit @freewritehouse! There you can meet fellow lovers of goofiness and find even more contests every week! We’re also now featured in the @steembasicincome contest round-up! Find more opportunities to win SBI there!

Hang on to your punderwear...

There’s no business like show business, so let’s show you the business we’re dealing with today!

Here’s last week’s post, and all the puns that are eligible to win this week are in the comments!

@improv/punday-monday-66-contest-win-sbi-read-jokes-make-jokes-also-my-entry-in-comedy-open-mic-round-32

Pocket Choice awards

Every Friday, I put up a post to solicit audience favorites! They can vote on their favorites by sending POCKET to whomever they want to win. This week’s post is here:
@improv/pocket-friday-for-punday-monday-last-opportunity

This week’s winner won a #steembasicincome share, because @freedomshift sponsors an SBI award for our #ccc qualified contest posts. Check out what the Curation Circle Creed is all about by visiting this link: The Honor Code - the Creed (Conditions and Limits Inside)

@diebitch won because @paul.atreides’ chose her! You could be choosing these winners! Check out the feed every Friday to find out how! This was POCKET Choice Awards’ 1st Anniversary! One punster in the POCKET winners’ circle will win…. 1000 Pocket!!! See that announcement below!

If you want to LEARN about POCKET, so you can participate in voting for your favorites, go ahead and check out this link
@improv/pocket-friday-for-punday-monday-here-s-a-way-to-use-your-pocket-and-get-a-laugh
You can also check out more info by @biophil, the creator of POCKET, and he’ll teach you. Check out his posts!

The folks in the POCKET Choice winner's circle are @aloha-creations, @professorbromide, @tcpolymath, @miniature-tiger, @lilygolightly, @chrisroberts, @stinawog, @f3nix, @doctorcrypto, @heroic15397, @littlescribe, @diebitch, @acolucky, @ablaze, and @paul.atreides.

POCKET Choice Awards Season One Winner!

This award is given to a punster who not only impressed their peers, but who consistently puns with us and who USES POCKET! @paul.atreides! Paul, 1000 pocket are yours to do with as you will, but I’m sending you 10,000 POCKET. The remaining 9000 Pocket I am entrusting to you, not to vote on your favorite puns with, though I hope you’ll continue to do that, but instead to distribute to users you believe will use them to choose their favorite puns. You shall bring in punsters and non-punsters to appreciate the puns, give them the means to vote, and guide them through the process of sharing their admiration by using POCKET each week to select POCKET Choice winners. Use your powers for good!

and our grand prize…

The prize for best pun

Best pun of the entire week

Winner of our weekly SBI share giveaway

Best Overall Pun

DRUMROLL, PLEASE

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.

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@acolucky! A pun that spans three words and still makes sense! What creativity!

Another big week with many puns! I’m so proud of our veteran punsters! You all are consistently hilarious, and you should have plaques on your walls that say so. If you didn’t read last week’s, go read them all! It’s never past payout for a laugh attack. I’m also proud of you all for interacting so beautifully and humorfully and supportively. YOU ARE GREAT.

And what prizes do they win, you ask?

Why, as usual, all the punsters got full strength upvotes on their submissions. (WORTH $0.02! So much value! I mean, considering HF20 and last week...really, it is.)

Our category winners will each get to choose a post (of their own or someone else's) and I will give that post a fully powered upvote -let me know in a comment here- and a @tipu tip!

And they all get big, exciting SBI prizes!
sbi.png
(@diebitch, you’ll get your POCKET Choice award from @freedomshift!)

NEXT WEEK'S PRIZES WILL BE BIGGER!

Punday Monday has received 32 STEEM from @curie to increase our prize pool for the next several weeks! That means winners of this contest will receive not one, but 2 SBI! Rookie of the Week (so if you're new, get in here!) will win 2 SBI from @improv. POCKET Choice Award winner will still win 1 SBI from @freedomshift, but now also 2 SBI from @improv! Our overall best pun will receive 2 SBI from @improv!

Remember, our POCKET Choice Awards are the PEOPLE'S Award. That's part of why they will now be receiving an even larger award. IF YOU WANT TO VOTE, A) Check out Friday's POCKET Punday Post and B) see someone with POCKET (notably, @biophil, @paul.atreides, or myself) to get yourself some.

This week's pun topic is...

Home! (I’m home)

As in,
Everybody feels comfortable in our house because here it’s ok! We don’t censor! Feel free! It’s Say fffffffffff-

Perfect,

I'm so good at puns....

If you've never punned before, it might seem like magic! You can do it, too! Learn how in My Free How-To Guide on Punning!

Who do I nominate for @comedyopenmic’s comedy challenge? This past week’s winners, @paul.atreides, @diebitch, and @acolucky...


And, as long as I have your attention… well, this place is already saturated with people who have referral codes for various “free money” things, but here are mine!

Coinbase: Cryptocurrency investment- https://www.coinbase.com/join/5929c0788331aa072d9e347e
(Hot tip, I buy BTC on pro.coinbase.com, then send it to bittrex to trade for Steem and send steem to my wallet here. It’s the most efficient way with the fewest fees I’ve found. If you’ve found better, let me know. - I learned from someone else that buying LTC and sending it to bittrex then trading it for BTC then trading that for STEEM is the least-fees way. Can someone confirm?)
Robinhood: investment platform buying/selling stocks- http://share.robinhood.com/brendaw92
Earn.com: small tasks for small rewards (need a business or .edu email) - http://earn.com/improv/referral/?a=qmk07e7tzua677hk
Mannabase: sign up for universal basic income distribution funded by cryptocurrency- https://www.mannabase.com/?ref=3984bea863
Swift: Yet another attempt at a UBI: https://www.swiftdemand.com/?referred_by=lochleinn

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