Good people have good lives, it is what Karma says and what they always told me. It is clear. I am not a good person. From the moment I, the unwanted one, was born, my life was full of violence, abuse and I have been molested day and night.
For sure I can not be a good person. I am a monster. That monster that needs to be destroyed. They all agreed about that. My mom, the whole family, church, their friends, the neighbours, school and CPS.
They all knew what was going on. They even saw it happen. They have seen the marks, blue spots, the fear in a little child its eyes. Saw its behaviour. The way it walked, did hide, seldom spoke, made no friends.
No one cared. They all felt comfortable in their lives. They agreed, even gave a hand to finish the job, to kill that monster or at least lock it up, preferable at a place where she can never escape out of again! A kid that tells such a bad things about her mom, a wealthy person, educated and even a famous midwife, must be a monster. Can only be crazy and needs to get out of the way.
A child that tries to commit suicide at the age of 6 already is for sure not "quiet right" in her head.
The mom is right, school is right, CPS is right, the family, including siblings and the neighbours are right: the kid makes it all up, it is a cry for attention, it is jealous. It is lied.
There is no room in society for children, people, like that. Liars, crazy people do not deserve help! They do not belong in the society.
I escaped from a horrible life. A life you can not even imagine. I did it myself, at a young age and payed a very high prices for my right to live. Just to be there.
I am not asking you to believe me, to be my friend, to feel sorry for me. There is no need any longer to comfort me nor comfort the child inside of me.
Everybody did let me down during the biggest part of my life, already a long time ago. CPS, the doctors, hospitals, school(teachers) and family and friends most of all.
I made new friends. They are inmates, are my pen-pals. They do believe me, do not say I am a crazy liar and became a big part of my life.
Now you know who I am. A molested child, a molested adult (no it did not stop my husband was a molester too) but I did escape from it. I did escape from the bad people who even dare to say it is karma!