SPECIAL POST 200 FOLLOWERS - Feeling emotional

Hello, everyone! How are you? I hope you're fine!

Well, where do I start?... I've been doing almost a daily drawing and I'm overwhelmed. It's a record for me considering that before being here, doing 1 or 2 drawings per month was almost a miracle. So, it's been a few days since my last drawing and apart from that, I've been busy, that's why I've been absent. The situation that I'm going through (and Venezuelans in general) is exhausting me physically and mentally to the point that I can no longer draw.

On Sunday, I woke up thinking about what could I draw, but I couldn't do anything. In front of me was my sheet and in my hand a pencil, but it was as if my brain had forgotten how to draw. I tried to make some sketches again and again, but everything went wrong; they were all a reflection of my mental state. That's why I decided to make this series of drawings expressing emotions when I finally could do something with my hand.

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I'm supposed to be excited to have reached 200 followers, but I'm not happy. Don't misunderstand me, the support and the people that I have met in this platform during these almost 2 months have been incredible for me. It has been a wonderful experience and I have learned a lot from other people.

Steemit has given my life a 180 degree turn. YOU with your support have helped me a lot, but what I was afraid would happen is happening. Since my stay in this platform I see it as a job, drawing has become more a business than a hobby which I enjoyed.

How could I expect someone to enjoy seeing what I do when I don't?...

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Sometimes, people press you to do things because "you should do it". It's like "Oh, you know how to draw, you have to be an artist", "you should do this and that to be a real artist", "true artists do not do that "... For that kind of comments, the word "artist" has been bothering me a lot. In some way, I feel that I fail you and myself if my work doesn't meet expectations.

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To finish, I want to apologize for this. Maybe many of you entered this post hoping to see a great drawing as in the previous special, but only found an girl exhausted from everything. This special was going to be different (and it really was), but not as I wanted it to be. I was thinking about some ideas for days and I changed my mind 3 times until this happened and in the end, I just wanted to share how I feel.

I remember that I even asked my sister what should I do for this special and she told me that she didn't know. I kept asking her and in the end she said "just do something original". I hope this is original enough, haha.

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I find this drawing funny because I did it when I was upset, but the girl's expression looks so relaxed

Thank you so much for taking your time and reading my post. Honestly, I feel better after having spoken with my mom and my sister. And finally, I will leave you a list of songs I heard while I was drawing. The list is shorter compared to the first special post because it doesn't took me much time to make these drawings.

Artist/Song

  • Lo air - Day and night
  • Astral planes - Exodus
  • Billy Talent - Red flag
  • Bloc Party - Banquet
  • Camille Saint Saëns - Danse Macabre
  • Echos - Haunt
  • FATE - Darkness
  • Goldfinger - My everything
  • LORN - ANVIL
  • NANOBYTE - Kalyke
  • NIGHTGRIND - Never ft. ANUBIS-XIII
  • PENSEES - Murky
  • Vivaldi - Four Seasons (Winter)
  • WORSE - Tomorrow
  • WILD - All my life
  • Kodyak - Into the trees

I think those were all the songs. Bye, guys! :D

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Latest posts: (。・ω・。)ノ♡

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