There's no such thing as a 'quick trip' to Target.
I tucked the kids into bed and left the house for what I promised myself would be the world's first quick trip to Target. I only needed dish soap after all, so I would be in and out faster than green grass through a goose.
Target is less than a mile from my house and I've been there probably a million times but for some reason, this time, I thought I'd be clever and take a "back way" to avoid traffic. Welp, after circling through the neighborhoods I found myself lost. Eventually I made it to a neighborhood street that didn't connect to the parking lot but in the distance I could SEE the Target. I could see my Target.
So I decided, well, it's within sight, I've got 2 legs, I'll just walk over. And that I did.
I only needed dish soap but as I passed the grocery section I had a flash of inspiration: I decided I also needed to make homemade nutella. So logically, I needed hazelnuts. Surely a monster mega store like Target will have hazelnuts.
No dice.
I decided I'll just go ahead and check out and I'd stop at the grocery store on the other side of the parking lot before I went home.
On my way to the checkout I was stopped in my tracks by a really cute shirt. Ah yes, this will fit perfectly. I don't even need to try it on. Into the cart it went.
I walked over to the grocery store to get my hazelnuts. This homemade nutella was happening one way or another.
It's a big name grocery store, and I'm in a major metropolitan area. If it doesn't stock hazelnuts....wait, there are FOUR signs for nuts in this grocery store. Nuts in the produce section, nuts in the baking section, nuts in the snacks section, nuts in the NUT AISLE. I scan the shelves looking for hazelnuts but all I see is wall to wall almonds. There are literally 30 different flavors of almonds, from sriracha to blueberry to salt and vinegar.
When did we let this happen? When did we decide that we needed 30 different shades of almond? Good Lord.
AND NO HAZELNUTS.
It was then when my eyes landed on what can only be described as fate.
Macadamias. Sweet, smooth, fragrant, special-occasion only macadamias would be the prize of my copycat nutella. And I decided that my recipe would be thinner than nutella - easily drizzled on all types of delectable treats, from breakfast through dessert. (In moderation of course...maybe) (no, actually, no moderation).
So I hoofed it back to the car with my dish soap, cute new shirt, and macadamia nuts, and off I went to proclaim my fantastic macadamia-chocolate plan to my hubs. I announced to him that I'd use my favorite kitchen multi-tasker, my refurbished Vitamix, to spin up some coconut oil, add the macadamias and semi-sweet chocolate, and then finish it off with a kick of cinnamon.
I would soon be the maker of a concoction that you would want to do the backstroke in like Augustus Gloop in the Willy Wonka movie.
Source
After I proclaimed my chocolaty plan, I moved on to the other goodies I scored on my outing. I set the dish soap next to the sink and then I proudly pulled out the cute shirt so I could do an impromptu fashion show, only to realize that it was not a shirt at all. It was a FREAKING ROMPER disguised as a shirt.
I tried it on but it was squeezing my shoulders down and my butt up and I actually felt my torso getting shorter.
Andy Cohen in a male romper. Image Source
There's no way I'm keeping this too-short-in-all-the-wrong-places garment which SHOULD be a shirt. This hasty accident is going to make me go back. To Freaking. Target.
I suppose all's well that ends well. This macadamia-cinnamon-chocolate sauce is kind of incredible. I've been using it on everything from fruit to peanut butter sandwiches to yogurt. I'll share another way I've used it in a recipe I'll post tomorrow too. Get ready, it's a good one......
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All content and photos by @jaymorebeet, taken on July 21, 2017 with a Canon EOS 7D Mark II.