I’ve always considered myself a rebel. I do come from a family of rebels after all! Not the kind of rebel that wanted to break laws and cause chaos or hurt others, but the kind where I felt compelled to rebel against what others told me, or told me not to do. 😌 Things that didn’t feel right in my soul.... pretty much our mainstream way of life. Against laws and rules that don’t make any sense. Against destruction of the planet and oppression of people, animals, life. Against anything that does not serve life or the highest good of all.
I have always walked to the beat of my own drum, realizing that trying to be someone Im not to fit into a box society and culture said I should, made me too uncomfortable to accept and live by. Im grateful to have been raised to always follow my own inner voice, compass, my heart. Ive always felt humans, would be self governing and live according to wisdom and love in a natural state.
Before I became a mother, freedom was all about living life anyway I chose and being able to do what I want, when I want to do it, not really understanding my connection and purpose. But that freedom lived within a limited matrix of rules, laws and unexpected events, that would not allow me to truly be me. To gain freedom in some areas, meant giving up my freedoms in others. After my mom died when I was 25, and my first daughter was a year old, my entire perception of what life really was changed in an instant.
My mom and I with Merle Haggard backstage at one of his shows!
She was the first person close to me, to die. I was no longer concerned about traveling and playing and having fun. All I wanted was my mom back. I couldn’t imagine how I was going to navigate thought motherhood and adulthood without her. Her wisdom, her strength, her unconditional and courageous love. I felt pain and grief and it took me a long while to heal from her death. And the few years that followed, contained another beautiful baby girl, my husband having an affair, ending in divorce, my younger brother passing away, intense family drama, and me almost losing it completely. With all of these unexpected events, I was experiencing so much emotional pain, I was finding it impossible to feel relief or have anytime to heal. I began to realize how Loving relationships are so important in our lives...
Working in a city, as a single mother, left me with no time to process everything that had happened in my life. All I wanted was to be home with my babies and give them a wonderful life. But I no longer felt free. No longer able to do what I wanted because I had so many responsibilities. So many bills and things to keep up with. Appointments and chores. Things that didn’t feel right. What makes life truly worth living, if we are not truly happy. And what do we do, when we feel we cant change the way things are? How do we find peace with so many distractions and obligations? I wish there was an easy answer to that question.
But for me, I was blessed at this time, and inherited some money. I wanted this money to be used for good... to grow into so much more, and knew it was a sacred gift. And so, I did what I felt my soul urging me to do. I did what everyone told me not to do, and even called me crazy for doing so.
I moved my girls and I out to the country from the big city. Out to the mountains and trees.
I bought an abandoned home on 10 acres and started bringing it back to life. It was extremely therapeutic for me and was a beautiful reflection for where I was in my life. I felt nurtured by the land, by the energy of Nature that surrounded me. I felt free to express my emotions and allow the pain in my heart out. My heart was so happy to see my girls being able to play and explore without so much restriction or danger. They were free to play and create and imagine. To see them enjoying our surroundings and just being kids, was priceless. Planting gardens and flowers and trees, filled me with such a good feeling, that I was co-creating with the land, with the elements, and all was benefitting. The more love and nurturing I gave the land, the happier she became. The more gratitude I began to show for her beauty and fruits, the more she rewarded and gave. She taught me that everything we need to be truly happy, is already here. It is all here. And I began to feel true happiness. True contentment. Like a satisfaction I never felt from anything else before. I know if Im truly feeling content, happy, it feels effortless to express, to create, to Love. It feels effortless to celebrate, to support, to give, to receive. And it begins to ripple out everywhere!
This opened the door to wanting to understand why, we as people, feel so unhappy. I began to ask questions like, “What would this world look like if every person felt content and free to express and live according their own soul? If everyone felt supported, loved and nurtured? If we all received the best quality foods, sunshine and air? If we all received the simple gifts of nature freely and abundantly? What if?” That is a daydream I have everyday and Id like to see come true.
Freedom is expressed from our Soul. Freedom to live according to our own path. The path we are called to live. Freedom to speak and share our truths and wisdom. Freedom to explore and discover for ourselves what is true.
I express through sharing inspiration and beauty. Courage. Love. Wisdom. I express by choosing to align with integrity, honor and respect. For all of Life. I express my freedom by choosing to align with nature and knowing that we are all divine beings inside. I express my Freedom by aligning with love, compassion and forgiveness. To focus on solutions and growth. I express through growing food, medicine and plants of all kinds. I express my freedom by listening and learning from Nature. The life force. I express my freedom by continuing to listen and follow my Soul. My Heart. I express my freedom by choosing to only add love and value to this world. So that one day, my children will know a world filled with Love. A world where they can celebrate themselves and others and all we have created together. A world they can be proud of. A world that supports and nurtures their happiness and who they really are. We all deserve that now and in the future. And I hope I inspire others to express their freedom and believe in the amazing beings that they are.
I absolutely love the opportunity to tune into and write about freedom. So thank you, @sagescrub, for creating and inspiring this contest! #freedomchallenge
Freedom is what Im all about! For myself and for all. Im grateful to share and inspire and contribute to freedom in anyway I can. FREEDOM is our birthright!!
And Thank you to all of you here in the Steemit community!!! I have never felt so inspired by so many all in one place! The time for us to shine is NOW!! Steemit is a big part of freedom for so many, and Im grateful each day to be here, contributing to all our growth. Im here to celebrate and support and inspire all I meet!
Thank you for spending a moment with me! May you always follow your Heart and Soul. May you always feel free and believe in everything that you are.
So much LOVE!!
Crystal, The Garden Goddess 💚🦋
