Activists Missing After Declaring “War on Leather” at Motorcycle Rally
Posted on January 07, 2010.
Posted by Fuzzy Duffy
Activists Missing After Declaring “War on Leather” at Motorcycle Rally
Johnstown, PA (GlossyNews) – Local and state police scoured the hills outside rural Johnstown, Pennsylvania, after reports of three animal rights activists going missing after attempting to protest the wearing of leather at a large motorcycle gang rally this weekend.
Two others, previously reported missing, were discovered by fast food workers “duct taped inside fast food restaurant dumpsters,” according to police officials.
“Something just went wrong,” said a still visibly shaken organizer of the protest. “Something just went horribly, horribly wrong.”
The organizer said a group of concerned animal rights activist groups, “growing tired of throwing fake blood and shouting profanities at older women wearing leather or fur coats,” decided to protest in order to get more attention on the annual motorcycle club event “in a hope to show them our outrage at their wanton use of leather in their clothing and motor bike seats.”
“In fact,” said the organizer, “motorcycle gangs are one of the biggest abusers of wearing leather, and we decided it was high time that we let them know that we disagree with them using it…ergo, they should stop.”
According to witnesses, protesters arrived at the event in a vintage 1960’s era Volkswagen van and began to pelt the gang members with balloons filled with red colored water, simulating blood, and shouting “you’re murderers” to passers by. This, evidently, is when the brohaha began.
“They peed on me!!!” charged one activist. “They grabbed me, said I looked like I was French, started calling me ‘La Trene’, and duct taped me to a tree so they could pee on me all day!”
“I…I was trying to show my outrage at a man with a heavy leather jacket, and he…he didn’t even care. I called him a murderer, and all he said was, ‘You can’t prove that.’ Next thing I know he forced me to ride on the back of his motorcycle all day, and would not let me off, because his girl friend was out of town and I was almost a woman.”
Still others claimed they were forced to eat hamburgers and hot dogs under duress.
Those who resisted were allegedly held down while several bikers “farted on their heads.”
Police officials declined comments on any leads or arrests due to the ongoing nature of the investigation, however, organizers for the motorcycle club rally expressed “surprise” at the allegations.
“That’s preposterous,” said one high-ranking member of the biker organizing committee. “We were having a party, and these people showed up and were very rude to us.
They threw things at us, called us names, and tried to ruin the entire event. So, what did we do? We invited them to the party! What could be more friendly than that?
You know, just because we are all members of motorcycle clubs does not mean we do not care about inclusiveness.
Personally, I think it shows a lack of character for them to be saying such nasty things about us after we bent over backwards to make them feel welcome.”
When confronted with the allegations of force-feeding the activists meat, using them as ad hoc latrines, leaving them incapacitated in fast food restaurant dumpsters, and ‘farting on their heads,’ the organizer declined to comment in detail. “That’s just our secret handshake,” assured the organizer.
From the Below you will gather this was a satire , and I received it as an email years ago , I must confess, I thought it was true! But, really Funny , There were hundreds of comments on this story , and most believed it!.
I have taken items off youtube to add to the post, I did not author the original.
Origins:
Even those who don’t particularly follow the animal rights movement are generally aware of some of the publicity stunts that organizations such as People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) have engaged in to call attention to their cause,
such as attempting to elicit sympathy for fish by rebranding them as “sea kittens,”
protesting a dog show while dressed in Ku Klux Klan outfits, producing a racy “Vegetarians Have Better Sex” commercial for the 2009 Super Bowl, and engaging in street tableaux garbed in bloody furs.
Against this background, it’s probably not surprising that some readers would take at face value the article referenced above, which describes a group of animal rights activists who decided to stage a protest against the use of leather at a motorcycle gang rally, and for their efforts ended up being duct-taped inside restaurant Dumpsters or force-fed hamburgers by annoyed bikers: