Nature's Official "It's Spring" Announcement Technique In North Idaho
Today my husband told me he needed our little blue car to transport some children to pistol practice. It's only three miles up to the library, so I told him that I would drive our old Suburban Beulah the Battleship so he could have the car for the much longer trip to the shooting range. I was happy to oblige for as a person of a height challenged stature, I quite enjoy driving that big steel beast.
A short while later, decked out in my librarian-wear, I hopped into the front seat of the Suburban and began my seat forwarding ritual so that I could reach the pedals. It was then that I absentmindedly turned on the windshield wipers for my view out of the windshield was obstructed. It then dawned on me that the obstruction was pine pollen, for the pine trees in our vicinity appear to be having a competition with the worlds volcanoes. That song, "Anything you can do, I can do better" sprang to mind as I watched clouds of yellow green pine pollen mist float by.
A short while later I was happily completing opening procedures in order to get the library up and running for the day when I spied the main headline in our local venison wrapper. The pine pollen plague had made the front page:
Throughout the rest of the day the side effects of our pollen problem were evident as most of the patrons came through the door exhibiting pollen overdose symptoms, coughing, sneezing, and puffy, red eyes were present in abundance. The moaning and gnashing of some of our more vociferous members was heard as they lamented the great dusting that Nature was assaulting our community with.
The thing that I find most amusing about the whole scenario is that this phenomenon happens every single year. I might accept that it is a tiny bit more voluminous than normal, but what I think might be the case is there are a ton of new people that have graced our panhandle with their presence and perhaps they've just never went through a pollen plague before.
As any helpful 'brarian would do, I have some pollen plague survival tips for neophytes:
DO NOT wash your car until the pollen ceases. To do so would be a waste of your time and resources. Your car is going to look like it was sprinkled with lime green pixie dust by the spring announcing wood gnome for at least another week. Just grin and bear it, maybe it's good luck!
Speaking of pixie dust, I know that the pollen is a beautiful shade of chartreuse, but as far as I know it doesn't have any magical health powers like bee pollen, so I would hold off sprinkling it on your french toast.
Don't try to hold in that sneeze. We are all doing it, it is super trendy, like, we could totally start a thing on Instagram of #pinepollenpics showing off our faces mid sneeze. Totes.
In closing, just remember Panhandlians, this too shall pass.
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And as always, all of the images in this post were taken on the author's pine pollen covered iPhone.