What Makes Me Feel Most Vulnerable? #167

Would you join me in exploring vulnerability today because I think this might be helpful for all of us to be more comfortable with our bodies?

What makes me feel most vulnerable?

The idea of putting pictures up of this body without any clothes on, or nude photos, that makes me feel most vulnerable.


I am inspired by my friend Tyler who is @wunderwoff here. We've played Xbox online for about eight years. His first pictures on Steemit were what he calls a bare art project where he's painting totally in the nude.

I actually enjoyed seeing those pictures. I feel like it's courageous to reject, essentially, the status quo that we have to have our bodies clothed at all times because our bodies are shameful. This belief says that these bodies are sex objects and we must keep them covered for politeness and for dignity. @steemed-open an @eveuncovered and @nakedbakers have also inspired me the same as Tyler has!

I like there's some judge's quote that says obscenity, he says in the quote, "I'll know it if I see it." That is in my opinion what gives an opportunity for all of us to essentially show our true selves, to be accountable to what our body looks like, to not have to be covered behind closed doors all the time.

I like what Tyler said. He said that if he goes and stands naked in front of his window in Oklahoma, that's illegal there. Someone might see him naked in his own home through the window and he could get charged with indecent exposure.

Now, that's crazy because these are our most beautiful creations. After all, I've been working on this body longer than I've been working on any post or any project online. I've been working on this body every day of my whole existence that I can at least remember, and even that I can guess out before that. I also think if we look at some other things as to why the bodies need to be clothed all the time, there's some really good opportunities in there.

I know, personally, that I'd like to see most of the people I follow on Steemit and I'm interested in following their future. I'd like for the option to be there for me to look at nude photos. I'd just be interested to see what everyone else's most beautiful creation looks like. Men and women, even old, fat or ugly. In my opinion, it makes it even more interesting because beautiful or young bodies often tend to look very similar. The old, wrinkled and fat bodies are more interesting.

I've felt a lot of shame about my desire to see people naked. I've felt that way since I saw my mom naked by accident. I was 12 years old and I don't know why, but I just barged into the bathroom when she was in the shower.

She used to spend a lot of time in the bathroom just getting ready, putting make-up on and doing her hair, and for some reason, I just barged in and she was standing there naked. She just got out of the shower and I was terrified, "Oh my God. I'm so sorry."

All of these things go all the way back to the Bible. The Old Testament talks about, "You shall not see the uncover nakedness of your parents." It's funny that even though a lot of us claim to be agnostics or atheists, or say "we don't practice these Christian things," a lot of these ideas about what we need to do with our bodies go all the way back to these Old Testament things and beyond.

Then we are essentially preaching and following them in every single thing we do, which begs the question, "Is there a better way to live?"

Even more than that, "What are the assumptions?"

What are we assuming when we suggest that for other people's safety, or for decency, we need to have our genitals clothed at all times?

It's even more ridiculous, I think, when you start looking at things like the woman's body.

Right now, I could take my shirt off in this video. It'd be no problem. I could take this shirt off and put this on YouTube and on Facebook. While there might be derogatory comments, that would be no issue. Just posting the photo below on Steem launched at least one entire post citing this photo as the reason I am awful!

Now, if my wife were to do the exact same thing, not even to expose anything below the waist, but if she just took her shirt off and posted a video or a photo on Facebook, even though she's been a user for a long time, she would probably get banned immediately. The photo will be flagged and taken down.

On YouTube, if she did that, she could get her channel penalized, if she had one. Potentially, if she did it multiple times, she could get banned from YouTube for literally just taking her shirt off.

I think that's crazy because of the assumptions that underlie the reasons for this.

Why is it necessary for a woman to keep her chest covered?

Why is it necessary for men and women to keep their genitals covered at all times?

Unless you're in the home having sex, which theoretically should only be done for procreative purposes and theoretically should only be done between a man and his wife, because if you're getting into all this Bible stuff that says, "We have to be clothed all the time," then you're getting into all that stuff too.

I think if we really want freedom, it comes down to leading by example. I think one of the big reasons, the assumptions behind why we can't be naked are the following: men are beasts, men are animals.

If a man were to be exposed to the nakedness of a woman, then he might commit an act of violence against that woman.

Even men on men, if men are around other men's nakedness, men are such predators that they are likely to commit an act of violence against other men.

This is the underlying assumption I see for why we need to be clothed all the time.

In the US at least, in my past especially, I used to talk down about countries where women had to be clothed like some of the countries where women have to have veils and cover their whole bodies. I used to purely see those countries as backwards and foolish.

What I realize is that while many of us focus on the women's rights, that the women should be able to show their face and maybe a little more skin than a foot or an ankle, while it's easy to focus on the women's rights in that respect, we also need to focus on the men's rights.

Men should have the right to feel that if they see the nakedness of a woman, they are not such a beast that they must commit an act of violence. That to me is one of the huge underlying shameful things that we don't talk about in our collective world and you can see it.

I noticed as a young man that there's a lot of fear between young men and young women. When I go to the grocery store, and while older men and women as well as children would very frequently make eye contact with me and smile, often younger women especially, tend to be afraid to even be near me. It's not me as a person, it's me as a man.

The fear is that young men are such beasts that if you were to present a naked woman in front of them, they couldn't really be blamed for going through with the act of violence, that young women are such victims that if they were to present themselves naked, they would just be totally helpless to do anything about it.

I think that when we're willing to show our nakedness on something like Steemit, which is a social network that is censorship resistant, decentralized, and allows us to post naked photos we are tearing down some of these huge, shameful, stereotypes or laws that have been written into our way of living.

When people like my friend Tyler have the courage to present their naked photos, we are breaking down the barriers between us.

Yet, even though intellectually I know this, I've been emotionally conditioned that it's not okay for me, that I would be a pervert to show my nakedness to anyone besides my wife. If I do that, I'm a pervert and that's why I feel very vulnerable, even considering posting pictures of simply the truth.

My naked body is simply the truth.

It exists.

It's what is underneath the clothing.

It's not something made up, and not in a sexual way either.

Just factual.

Here it is.

Then there's no more secrets.

There's no more of these little games, like trying to compensate for things.

There's the facts.

I think the world I want to live in, a world where we are not afraid of each other, is a world where we're willing to be naked and feel safe about it. Imagine a group of people just feeling safe sitting in a room naked with each other. In my opinion, this is our very basic humanity. That's a humanity where we all feel loved, safe and connected.

A humanity where there's not these weird things where a woman has to go cover up her flesh to go breastfeed, and go hide in a room or put on a cover, and that if we are allowed to see nakedness, then it won't be something we are ashamed of.

I've obviously looked at a lot of nakedness in my life and I felt ashamed about it. For the first time, Steemit is empowering me to see the nakedness of others and to not feel ashamed of it, to not feel like I'm doing something wrong or perverted by simply seeing another body.

Would you like me to have the courage to go forward with this?

Not that you would have to look or need to look.

Do you think this is something worth doing?

This makes me feel most vulnerable, that I would post something like that, and then maybe everyone would look at it. Then, any time I'd see and interact with people, they would have seen me naked at my most travel-size genital ratio.

"Travel size" is how I like to refer to it when it's essentially normal.

I value your opinion on this because I've seen several other people on Steemit, men and women, who are having the courage to open up and share their bodies, a social network that allows us to do that, and actually even pays us for our courage.

Do you think that's something worth doing?

Thank you for reading this today because some of these are the seemingly little or pointless things we might work on that make a huge change in our world, that allow us to unplug from the matrix of stereotypes, expectations, and Old Testament rules.

Even though we go around saying things like, "God damn it," or "I'm an atheist," or "I don't believe in God," or "I don't know about God," we go around obeying the Old Testament in our way of living, as if it's a fact. We condemn others who aren't obeying it as if it is a fact.

Not that there's anything wrong with the Old Testament rules, but "Hey, is this the world we want to live in?"

What kind of world do you want to live in today?

A world where I don't go through with sharing?

I already asked my wife and she said that it seems more reasonable than some of the other things I've already shared online. She sees no problem with it. I think it'd be great if she posted her pictures online.

I think she could probably earn $100 a post on Steemit. I would certainly upvote them. My wife has a beautiful body. Why shouldn't anyone be welcome to see it, who would like to see it, and to just look?

There we go, that's my thought for today.

I love you.

You're awesome.

I hope you have a wonderful day today.

Final words


Thank you very much for experiencing this episode of Happier People Podcast with me, which was originally filmed as the video below!

The feedback on the video was so positive that I spent about $100 to get this post created for you here out of the video, and then edited it prior to publishing! I appreciate you being here and I hope you have a wonderful day today.

If you found this post helpful on Steemit, would you please upvote it and follow me because you will then be able to see more posts like this in your home feed?

Love,

Jerry Banfield with edits by @gmichelbkk

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