Attention: This post has been written by @sykochica
Before we can get into defining gender, we need to cover a couple of things.
Gender and Sex
While the terms Sex and Gender are interchangeable terms for many people, it is important to understand the distinction.
Sex refers to biological differences; chromosomes, hormonal profiles, internal and external sex organs.
Gender describes the characteristics that a society or culture delineates as masculine or feminine.
Gender Identity and Sexual Orientation
In this picture we see four independent spectrums. This means that a position chosen on one doesn't effect (or limit options) on the others. A common misconception is that Gender Identity is the same as Sexual orientation. For example, a male to female transgender person has to like men, right? In fact, this transwoman, whose gender identity is female and could like men, women, both, be pansexual, asexual, or a slew of other options on the sexual orientation spectrum. The same availability of options apply to gender expression.
And Finally....What is Gender
Imagine a world where people were free to think, talk, dress, and present as they please? Do you think there would even be a concept of gender? Couldn't males act feminine or females act masculine without any issue? Society has developed what is acceptable for each gender and for a long time have gone against those who dare to step outside such "norms."
Language is also deeply embedded with gender. Have you ever noticed how many he/she pronouns you use in a day? Ever find it strange that languages including French, Spanish and Italian all have gender designations for inanimate objects? Do we really need to know that the table is feminine and use 'la' instead of 'le'?
Thousands of years back our biology ruled and was the primary concern for pre and early civilization. It's only natural that ways of thinking and language became embedded as the norm. With modern society we've gained the ability to think outside of this and see that gender can differ from sex, ideally allowing people to identify and express themselves freely.
Yes, biology has some effect and so does social interactions. There are still kids out there that are told (or worse) that "they shouldn't play with certain toys because it's not for their gender." This statement highlights key issues.
- Parents assuming that their child's biological sex is the same as their gender identity (male = masculine, right?)
- Social and/or familial norms of what someone else's gender should be.
These things are subtle and easily missed so I'm not trying to make anyone out to be a bad person. Things like this are rarely brought up or presented. However, it is still important to notice the effects these have to a young child who doesn't fully understand the world yet. Many times a child (or older) will present a gender identity or gender expression different from how they feel for practical reasons. The abuse, scorn and violence to the transgender community is staggering, can you really blame them?
Full Size Image
Gender Feedback Loop
As nice as it would be to have gender be a non-issue, where people were free to live, act and express themselves according to their own compasses, many parts of society backlash against those that don't hold to society's standards of gender roles or the gender binary itself (i.e. non-binary, gender fluid, etc.) To live life as a trans or non-binary person requires not only coming to grips with internal feelings and preferred methods of expression but also running these through a feedback loop with society.
For example, when I was about 5 or 6, expressing myself in ways that were socially considered feminine (at the time) such as wearing "my emotions on my sleeve" or crying was met with being picked on, sometimes bullied. The practical decision for me was to not express such things and hence be left alone. How I look and express is "digested" by others and how they treat me either positively or negatively reinforces my behavior. This is the feedback loop.
The sense of one's gender identity is acquired through the internalization of external knowledge. However, it is in fact never fully acquired – it has to be constantly performed and reenacted in social interactions. (source)
Trans and non-binary people have to first find the courage to identify and express as they see fit, and then hope for positive interactions with society. While many are able to succeed in their transition the statistics of those who aren't so lucky are staggering. On every study I've seen in the United States or the UK, over 40% of all transgender people attempt suicide at some point in their life, compared to about 5% rate for the general population.
I know we've all heard the counter arguments here, saying the trans or non-binary person is "sick" which leads to the horrifying statistics of suicide. But they never seem to mention that these are people who were kicked out of their home or disowned by parents, bullied endlessly, trolled online, shunned by friends, kicked out of their places of worship, beaten up, raped and sometimes murdered. Is it any wonder that at least 4 in 10 transpeople try at some point to take their own life?
Until the day that gender is irrelevant (i.e. people are free to identity and express as they please) society MUST accept it's role in propagating these imposed "norms." While it takes times to change something as deeply embedded in society and language as gender, simply being accepting of somebody who has the courage to Identify and Express their core self outside of these "norms" goes a long way in the mean time.
Be a part of the Positive feedback loop.
Additional Reading:
What's Gender Anyway
Transgender Suicide Statistics
Image Sources:
Gender Roles
Spectrums
Trans Statistics
Jazz Jennings
Attention: This post has been written by @sykochica
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