⏺My biggest insecurity: My blind eye.. Part 1 (Never opened-up about this before)


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This is going to get a little deep. I haven't opened-up about this yet, but I am in-fact blind in my left eye.

Let me tell you my story. (Read till the end.)

I was 7 years-old when it happened. It was at pre-primary school, during our break-time. All the boys were throwing their caps up into the tall, nearby tree, thinking it was really fun.. Until their caps got stuck. How did they get them back down? Well, they thought it was a fun idea to throw stones into the tree to get them back down.

So my friend came to me, trying to show me how far he could throw his rock.. And then it happened.

The rock slipped from his hand when he tried to throw it, and it hit me in the left eye.

I blacked-out for a few seconds.. Couldn't really remember anything, then I gained consciousness again. My face was covered in blood, and I didn't know what emotion to feel. They took me to the reception, where I waited there for about 30 minutes for my mother to arrive. I was feeling incredibly weak. I went to the doctor where he started to examine my situation.

He couldn't come to any conclusions at that point. He just cleaned my eye out with a few ear-buds and that was that.
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Six months had gone-by since that moment. I was living fine, until we had an eye-testing day at school. I didn't know a thing about what was going to happen. When it came to my turn to read the letters through the glass, I told the lady she needed to open the latch, because I couldn't see anything. She was yelling at me to stop fooling around. I think she was in a big shock when she found-out the truth.

My parents were contacted, and I went back to the doctor. We did some formal eye-tests and examinations, and then the doctor told me the news.. I am blind in that eye. I wasn't too shocked, as I was already used to it. I didn't really feel much different.

Until he start doing more examinations, and advised that I have an operation done to remove the lens.

So that happened. I was in bed for 3 months after that.. My entire life had done a 360-turn. After that, my eye couldn't handle the trauma, so I had to do another 4 more operations. From that point, we just left it. Not thinking about the long-term trauma my eye would suffer, we just moved on.
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Now, why is this my biggest insecurity?

I actually nearly cried multiple times while writing this very article. All the lessons I have learnt, and all the struggle I, and my family have been through, it's been hectic.

It's amazing how something so simple in one person's perspective, can impact another person's life so much more differently. His name was Luke. That's the kid who through the stone. I remember his face, and other features so clearly. I remember his voice in the back of my head. I think one of the main reasons where my initial depression started was when he didn't even feel the need to ever apologize for what he had done. I don't even think he took me seriously when I tried to explain to him what happened a year later.. It had driven me insane for years.

From about age 12 I had to start wearing glasses. They didn't really suite my face, so I of course used to get mocked by my peers. What could I do but just suck it all up! I didn't have any other choice. This started to build up to my chronic depression. It lasted for about 5 years.

I have realized that this story can be very, very long, still so many details.. I hope you have even gotten this far. I will make Part 2 in the next post. Stay tuned!

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My previous motivational post:
Does life play tricks on us? Productivity killer!

My previous image-gallery post:
📽Anime gallery: Berserk (Part 2)

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