How should a libertarian eat steak?

Hello and welcome back to How should a libertarian. This, as you well know by now, is the column that tackles the tough, philosophical questions in life. Today, the libertarian way to eat a steak!

What is that you are saying? Libertarianism is about individual freedom and anyone should eat steak any damn way they please? Nonsense! That way lays chaos! Disaster! Dogs and cats living together!

Next thing you’ll tell me, libertarians should be free to be vegan. Heresy! Pandemonium!


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Now, I am for freedom as much as the next libertarian, but some things are more important. One of those things is not destroying a fine piece of beef steak by cooking it past medium rare. What are we commies? To eat grey, dry, flavorless, well done meat? I say nay!

How do you think our friendly neighbourhood steemit whales got where they are? Black and blue baby, that is how.

So how should a libertarian eat a steak, oh you so wise in the ways of libertarianism? Glad you asked.

Well, like all good things in life, everything starts with quality meat. Now tenderloin may be considered the best of beef cuts by some, it does not work as a steak that well. Not enough fat, you see. You can do a tartar, or roast it rare and slice it, and it makes a fantastic meal. But steak? Neah.

Prime rib is a fab piece of meat. But is also not a steak, but so much more.

So we are left with ribeye, T-bone, New York strips and porterhouses, for those of us of prodigious appetite. But, as I said before, a libertarian cares about fitness so watch them waist lines.

We have our meat. What now? Seasoning and fire! Salt and pepper, and some additional spice if you so wish, but use a light hand as the meat should be the main feature. Then cook it to a nice rare to medium rare. Give it a good crust on the outside and make it as uniform as possible on the inside. A sous vide machine and good torch is optimal for achieving this.

Well what about sauce? Well we are talking about steak, not goose. A good steak does not need sauce. But fine, if you absolutely must, you can add a bit of bearnaise or some pepper sauce, but use it sparingly.

How about sides? Jesus, you ask a lot of questions. Must I think of everything? I don’t know, have a baked potato or some mushrooms, what the hell to I care. And, loath as I am to eat rabbit food, a good salad may work. Absolutely no broccoli. Ever.

What should I drink? Well now we’re talking. A nice glass of whiskey while the steak is cooking and a glass of a good full bodied red wine while you eat. And that’s about it. Keeping it simple.

Oh and real libertarians don’t do desert. If you want something to keep the meal going, some good cheese and another glass of wine work fine. Sweets are for children and socialist. But I repeat myself.

So steak, how libertarian is yours?

Edit and note: the pictures are not my own doing, I think I should mention that.

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