Sex generally is a topic people tend to shy away from discussing especially Africans as they mostly see it as an abomination or just an act to discuss with/act our with their partner in private.
Courtship on the other hand has solely been placed on the already burdened shoulders of religion to mete out rules and regulations guiding them.
Marriages these days are based on selfish desires, greed and most times, peer pressure!
The one thing that unifies couples together in marriage or courtship better than money or any other thing is sex. why then is sex an issue that should be discussed in the 'dark'?
While courting, most religious bodies (that's the only set of people we listen to these days) will tell you to avoid sex with your partner and keep the bed undefiled till marriage. Do marriages where sex isn't involved in courtship stay stronger or better than those that have sex during courtship? No! While courting, it is important to do everything possible to know your partner at all levels, sex inclusive
If you keep your bed 'holy' till marriage and discover after the wedding that your sexual orientation and chemistry aren't in sync what would you do? Would you give him or her a divorce that could have been avoided in courtship? Remember that ending a relationship is way easier and less expensive than getting a divorce. I'm not saying religion should be pushed aside in courtship, I'm only saying we shouldn't be slaves to religion and pay for our shortsightedness later
HOW IMPORTANT IS SEX IN MARRIAGE?
Some men believe that once they are married, they can leave their wives unattended to and start having sex with single girls out there. I'll keep saying it, sex is the most unifying action in marriage, the more you have sex with your partner, the more you guys get closer and become a stronger unit overall. Sex in marriage is not only for procreation, it should be for pleasure also. Believe it or not, more than 50% of broken homes is as a result of lack of/inadequate SEX!
WHAT CAN BE DONE?
Ladies, please note that the fact you're married doesn't stop you from being hot/sexy. The moment ladies marry, they resort to being unattractive thereby making the husband seek sexiness elsewhere, please try to look as good as you looked when you guys met. And yes, do not just stay stuck on the missionary sex style, be adventurous and explosive, do lots of sex styles and positions as this would help you guys stay together stronger. Remember, the more sex you have with your partner, the more united you guys get. This isn't to say that other facets of relationship/married life should be ignored, sex is the most important of them all.
What is your take on sex, courtships and marriage?
I think i have to write this topic in series, What do you think?