Today’s lesson: What is Sapiosexuality all about?

When it comes to sexual tastes everyone is free to have their own, and there is a kind of sexuality that even if its not very common, it is becoming more popular with each passing day.

I am talking of nothing more than Sapiosexuality.

What is Sapiosexuality?

Those who are sapiosexual are stimulated or challenged by the way another person thinks. They are basically in love with the mind. Sometimes, sapiosexual individuals have also been called “nymphobrainiacs,” or individuals who find it arousing to engage with the intellectual perspective of another person. | Source

Its main characteristic is that it is attracted to intelligent people above all things, even over physical attraction (although that does not mean that physical importance disappears altogether, it never disappears).

Sapiosexual people find delight when interacting with other individual who can communicate efficiently, rationalize and debate all sort of issues, as well as being able to make cool intelligent jokes thanks to a good capacity for imagination and a fast mind. These qualities can easily make a person be considered original and unique, especially if we add physical talents that have nothing to do with the intellectual world. With this last point, we will have a perfectly well rounded person to engage with.

It is important, however, to clarify that by "intelligence" we do not speak exclusively of "raw brainpower" like the one that a scientist would display when solving equations, but rather having a differentiating talent above the average, whether in a scientific scenario, or in any other area of life, such as art, politics, among others. In life, there are all sort of talents in all sort of areas, and each one of them can be interesting.

So for example these individuals may feel attraction towards an amazing book author, or a fascinating ballet dancer, a talented architect, a successful entrepreneur such as Jeff Bezos ( the founder of Amazon), or even a great historical painter as Leonardo da Vinci was.

When you think about it, why shouldn’t the brain be the thing we’re attracted to? Why would you want muscles over conversation? Why would you want looks over books? | Source

Our traditional attractions

It happens that we have (just like any other living being) an innate survival instinct. In the case of our species (and many more obviously), the way in which we perpetuate our species is by sexual interaction which involves the sharing of our genes from one individual to another.

And because of the way we evolved, the work of males ended up being to try to find an optimal partner to make sure our genes survive, and that means looking for females with physical attributes that are favorable to have healthy children.

This adventure of looking for healthy women to obtain healthy children has led to a mental game where men pay attention to the physical aspect of the woman, because if they see an attractive woman, their brains will signal suggest the fact that it might be worthwhile to reproduce with that woman. And that is why instinctively the looks of the woman plays such a powerful game when it comes to men making a first contact when looking for partners.

Something similar happens with females when choosing a male. Unlike the case with males, females do not directly look for a male that can properly hold a baby since that isn't the work that nature left to them, and this can be seen clearly in animals where its the female the one who always holds the little ones, instead they naturally look for a male that can ensure the survival and safety of that baby, which is the same as saying the survival of the species itself, and their own particular genes.

And in the times when we were cavemen, it meant to look for strong and skillful men who could not only look for food for the whole family, but also one that could defend everyone from any threats that they might encounter, like dangerous animals and extreme weather.

Survival means one thing: staying alive long enough to reproduce, so that the next generation can stay alive long enough to reproduce. Nothing else matters. Or at least it didn't when our brains were designed. This job, reproduction, was a brutal affair -- and it still is. | Source

However, given that in the case of women the main source of seeking a man was not only to be able to obtain sperm, but also to be able to provide for family protection, as civilization advanced, the concept of what a woman considered fit to provide and protect advanced as well.

For example, with the creation of more complex social organizations as villages and cities, a new type of creative and entrepreneur man appeared, which could now provide much better for a family with only the use of his intellect, instead of brute force like before. This new type of man just needed to be successful in one area like business, science, among others, to suddenly become the perfect candidate to protect the genes of the coming generation in the family.

Our lives today

And today, where we are living the birth of a society based on information, where knowledge is the most powerful weapon of survival of all, it is not surprising that each passing day its common to see the fact that it is this type of intelligent and successful man the one that attracts a considerable proportion of the female population.

Sometimes, however, platonic friendships between the sexes are also dependent on sapiosexual desires. This intellectual synergy simply fires up the relationship. This is often seen in the workplace and may be viewed as another aspect of being sapiosexual — that is, a desire to be connected with intellectuals, although the outcome is not always an intimate encounter. | Source

But this does not mean that physical attraction is not important, otherwise we would not have famous famous people showing their bodies at all times, but what it means is that we are in an era where our own process of evolving as a species is causing us to mature towards more abstract types of relationships, where we are beginning to give more importance to what is inside the minds of people, than to simply what’s on the outside.

Conclusion

Ultimately, we must not forget to realize that this explanation is only from the point of view of the most basic and primitive human instinct of all, because we also have a social conscience, plus an intellect that evolves while each of us educates ourselves more and more, this examples that I have shared so far of a woman who takes care of children, and a man who protects them, is also changing, and today more than ever we are beginning to see more equity in relationships between people, where the woman now in many cases can be the one that provides, and similarly, we have a new generation of men that also takes care of children.