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Dear Steemians,
I'm writing this letter to implore you to omit the "s" word out of your deplorable vocabulary. I realize, by the aggressive start to this letter, you may think I'm talking "shit." However, while that word is likely the first that comes to mind - and is one that is also over used - it's far down on the list.
So, here's a hint.
What irks me more than a dog with no tail is the adoption of the word "so" by people all over the nation. For whatever reason, we have decided that it is permissible to start our sentences with a conjunction while the rest of Americans sit and listen intently, as if by starting the sentence that way, the orator has something really insightful to say. Like I said: as if.
Before "viral" was a thing, starting sentences (consecutive ones at that) with "so" became a viral sensation. This was back in the mid-to-late 2000s, when whoever thought it was appropriate to do so, did it. And for whatever ridiculous reason, it caught fire. I blame it on "So, You Think You Can Dance?"
Now, like ant on a sugar cube, all sorts of people have adopted the ill-logic. The white collar, entry-level wanna-bes took a stab at it. Then their managers had a go. Then executives of small companies got in the game. Then executives of bigger companies anted up. Then people who think they are executives jumped in. Then folks who claim be educated made the leap. And now people all over think they have to start a sentence with that word in order to sound smart and fit in and command an audience.
Here's a gut-wrenching example:
"So, I went to the concert last night and it was awful," said John.
"Really? That's disappointing to hear. Why do you say that?" asked Jane.
"So, there were about 200 people..."
So lame.
I despise the English language when I hear that horrific dialogue - and it happens about 1,000 times a day. It's almost as if, since using the word "like" was frowned upon, we decided to substitute "so" in order to get our fix.
Instead, the interaction should omit one simple word:
"I went to the concert last night and it was awful," said John.
"Really? That's disappointing to hear. Why do you say that?" asked Jane.
"There were about 200 people..."
Much better.
America, please remember that very rarely is it grammatically acceptable to start a sentence with a conjunction. So, please stop. It's annoying, it's incorrect, and most of all it sounds stupid.
Sincerely,
Your 5th grade English teacher
PS - Please also stop ending a sentence with "right." It's almost just as dumb, borderline demeaning, and serves no purposes but to force someone to agree with you, right? Let's get back to basics...