Twas never a time in the land of the Britons that the name Lord Percival wasn't known to the peasants and noblemen alike. His name was uttered in reverence and respect for his heroic feats.
Such legendary stories were whispered throughout the towns and villages from Twathats to Cockplay speaking of this force of nature.
The seat of his family home was Shitlington Hall and mounted there were the heads of his vanquished foes.
No man living had seen his face for those who had, had died to keep his secret.
But one day a change came a quickening if you will when he answered the challenge of the STEEMORDS. The gauntlet had been thrown down by Sir Knight from the far off land of Criminalia, to find the mythical sword Excalibur.
The time to step from the shadows was afoot.........
Arise Lord Percival the Magnificent!
The land of your forebearers need a hero.
The Queen had appointed him Protector of the Realm after a steamy night of heroic bed play in which his magnificence had been proved to the royal court not only in the bedroom but on the battlefield when he had defeated the previous Protector of the Realm Sir Muxxy the Effeminate but had refused to kill him as he had plans for him in future adventures and in the STEEMLORDS quest in particular.
A trusted but albeit dimwitted cohort would be invaluable on this quest.
Sir Muxxy the Effeminate.
The manner of the STEEMLORDS challenge was still a mystery to the hero of the Britons however the gauntlet that had been thrown down by the Protector of the Realm of Criminalia Sir Knight was not to be ignored. He had amassed a formidable army of cut throats, thieves and brigands who had all been banished from the land of the Britons for their crimes. All bore a grudge and had spent what seemed like an eternity trying to prove they had already eclipsed the good folks of Britain, sadly to no avail.
Lord Percival had insiders in the Criminalia camp however in the duplicitous Sir Scooterless and a Criminalian Oracle known only as Ancientmystique so was empowered with inside knowledge of Sir Knights plans.
The renowned Criminalian Oracle 'AnicientMytique'.
The hunt for Excalibur was to be one that Lord Percival was determined to win, and no manner of deed would be low enough to stoop to ensure that end.
And so, the heroic Lord Percival the Magnificent prepared to set forth on his quest. He summoned his mighty steed the winged black stallion 'Tremendhorse' and prepared for the long and arduous journey.
The majestic and magical 'Tremendhorse'
Lord Percival set about securing Royal approval for the quest by sending word to the Queens court of his imminent departure. Fortunately Royal approval was given during a surprise booty call to Shitlington Hall by 'Queenie'.
Once the Queens appetite was quenched by the legendary 'Swordsman' she had Lord Percival lick the Royal ring in order to anoint the quest.
Once the ring licking ceremony was complete Lord Percival was finally ready for the journey. He bravely mounted his steed summoned the now quivering Sir Muxxy to mount his ride, a donkey called 'Dutch Pornstar' and set forth into the unknown...
What dangers would he face?
Which strange lands would he travel to.
How many fair maidens will be ravished on the journey?
What dreadful humiliations will Sir Muxxy be forced to suffer?
You will only find out by returning here for the next episode of STEEMLORDS.
Remenber this my friends ........
Thankyou for visiting.....
STEEMLORDS is the insane creation of @sirknight
All STEEMLORDS graphics are courtesy of the amazing @bearone
All Images courtesy of Google Images
