MOUNT AGUNG January 1st , 2016
Oh well , let me tell my story , why I decided to leave the so called paradise a while ago and then changed my mind again . OMG , you might say , as many of my close friends . Why the hell would you leave such heaven ? There are many reasons but I tell you the more positive side what actually changed such thought to another one :
"I gonna leave Bali but will always come back . 6 months travel and 6 months working holidays ! " My frustration left my ,sometimes depressed mind . I felt prickling motivation and wow , I saw the beauty once again around me and not burning plastic fumes nor garbage on our beaches . I smiled at people because I noticed theirs . I changed my mind set ! That's the point . Negativity is just an illusion and its up to you to switch off the bad stuff to focus on the good ! Its that simple to understand after a mind blowing Ayahuasca ceremony teaching you who you are .I wanted to reach the top of any mountain without fears nor doubts ! Life is a rollercoaster we ride or a rafting trip on the Ubud river . Fear has no value ! I would not advice to anybody to experiment with our natures " grandmother " of all medicines . For me , it worked ! Finally I had the perfect solution I always dreamed about since my 20's.
I asked myself this question on repeat like I usually do with good tracks I find on soundcloud. Should I really leave my comfort-zone and feed my craving urge to get the hell out . Why would I leave a lifestyle anybody could wish for . Bang , I had my future plan and no thought of stopping me to loose everything if I do just both . Go and come back and go again but how can I make this happen to secure my income as well .I found ways the moment I got that plan played out in my head . I manifested and it worked .
I knew what was important for me and what I am working for my whole life : Freedom and that view down from a volcano showed me the infinity of our universe . We do not have to set limits how we want to live the only life we have .
I tried to be a good responsible parent , caring friend successful agent , manager for artists , tried to be a good woman , compassionate animal lover , even Rotarian helping the ones in need, I was la Mammasitta for everything I thought needs me until I realized it was "ME who needed ME" the most ! Finally I would have quality time for myself finding the artist I might have lost long time ago when my German teacher criticized me that my essays were long and way too emotional . This stuffed up Austrian "cow" blocked my urge of writing for all those years , I did not even enjoy meeting my diary. I started writing in my journals when I was high or in love and pain , my secrets but I would never dare to write for the public .
The new adventure was set to go !
My daughter was ready to chase her own dreams and does not show much interest in me since she got her first boyfriend . First I was so disappointed , she let me down as a mother I thought but then I realized its her right to live without me to find her own happiness .
My Un-Happiness changed into excitement of the thought I would leave which I did for 2 trips to Europe for over 5 months in total and it was mind-blowing to connect with old friends I haven't seen for over 25 years except on facebook .
I will for sure write about those trips later , especially of my January 1st night at the famous DC 10 party at Circoloco in Ibiza where I danced for 12 hours through . Richie Hawtin played 4 hours and my dear friend Techno master , Steve Rachmad ended the long , very long night . Ha , Back to party but this time for my own fun !
ALLEGRIA = HAPPINESS
Richie Hawtin on decks ! Always wanted to see him play !
Don't we all want to leave the place we call home once in a while to explore other countries to learn about different cultures , meet new people because the same old faces on a small island (in my case ) start annoying you . I live here , work and also have to deal with my daily routine most of the time , meaning I cannot act like a happy holiday tourist every day .The life here is not as easy as you might think when you come to visit . OK , I can leave my house in flip flops , no make up and look like shit , hahaa .....nobody cares here anyways ....but in the West you need to keep your looks and image so much more . That's the Luxury I appreciate most , living in Bali and all those massages in-between office days , business meetings in fancy hotels or dinner next to the ocean in Sanur , paying 5 USD for one meal , heavenly meal with mahi mahi and bintang beers and the company of the sound of the ocean and all this just 5-10 minutes away from your house .
It is heaven indeed until you need a visa again :(
Every time we needed to renew these documents and this process is one of the most annoying things since 1999 , it will bring the worse out of you , experiencing the most annoying visits to immigration offices all over the world but mostly to the famous visa run to Singapore , hundreds of embassy visits while you rather enjoy the new country , city and it's beauty . It brings out anger, rage due to stress for everybody in the family . My daughter used to hate those trips but I kept it as fun as possible rewarding her with visits to Disneylands , waterparks and cool cinemas ( back in the mid 2000 we did not have modern ones here on the island , only one little shitty one in Denpasar) Visiting a modern , comfortable Singaporean movie theater was a always treat with our popcorn's in the hand , watching the latest films like we used to do in New York .
Island Fever overcomes us expats at least once every 6 month , sometimes shorter or if lucky it happens only once a year .
You MUST get up , go and do something else !
I conquered THAT FEVER & Don't ever forget to ROCK YOUR #gypsysoul as well
Your
Mammasitta
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