Ten years ago (2007) Carey and I were doing respite care for an indigenous young man caught up in the system. We worked hard to teach him self control, discipline and how to express his feelings in a safe and healthy way. We saw great improvements in his behaviour, schooling and social skills. I was even teaching him Tae Kwon Do as I was running my own club back then.
I will keep names out of this discussion to protect his privacy. He was with a foster family for many years and then an incident happen where he was then removed. We found out that CPS was bouncing him from home to home and we could not stand for that type of abuse. So we stood up and asked that he stay with us until his housing situation got straightened out. He did come and stay for about 6-8 weeks, but it was a problem for social services because we were living in a garage until we got our earthship built. Our 'living conditions' did not meet their 'standard', especially if he was going to be with us for a long period of time. We asked that he write to his social worker about what he wanted, which was to stay with us. He wrote a beautiful letter, but they removed him anyway. We then got a letter from the social worker with this attached to it:
Seems like his letter writing campaign continued even after he was removed. It was heart warming to hear from him and especially to see him express himself so well. But it crushed us to find out how much he was hurting, that he was crying himself to sleep at night and that his spirit was crushed by the transfer. He was a hurting young man and he needed to be heard desperately. It was clear to us that they were completely ignoring his feelings and wishes. I then started doing a lot of research and writing letters to support him in the hopes of giving him a voice. Turns out that British Common-Law gives children the choice on who their guardian is at the age of 10 (Blackstone Commentaries). I think the age has been increased to 12 as I did find this section within the act:
14(3) No agreement under subsection (1)(b) relating to a child who is 12 years of age or older shall be made without the consent of the child.
Section 17 states: “at fourteen is at years of discretion, and therefore may consent or disagree to marriage, may choose his guardian and, if his discretion be actually proved, may make his testament of his personal estate;”
I then wrote a letter to the CEO of Edmonton & Area Child & Family Services Region 6 confronting them on the violations of their own act, rebuking them for breaking the spirit of this young man. I put them on notice and gave them 30 days to respond. They ignored my letter. It is also important to note that my letter also sent to the minister and the band council of the reserve that the young man came from. I don't piss around and by doing this, it really pisses them off as they hate it when ministers get involved.
Meanwhile the social worker was pushing us to do a 'Home Assessment' and I had many questions. I then demanded a meeting with the CEO, social worker and their legal council to discuss the issue. I set the date and time in the letter too.
When we showed up I did not expect the board room to be full of people. In fact, I did not expect the meeting at all. Who summons CEO's anyway? But not only was he there, but there must have been 8 people there as well. The CEO was VERY angry at me, yelling, rebuked me for calling the meeting, etc. He suggested that I don't have the authority to summon him, but given the benefit of hindsight, apparently I do have that level of influence otherwise he would not be there. But his guilt trip rant continued for what felt like 15 - 20 minutes as he made it clear that what I did was very inconvenient for him and his staff, bla bla bla. This was ten years ago and I was still working through my confrontation skills. Because I was green and not sure of what I was doing, I backed down. Most likely will not do that today if in the same situation and knowing what I now know.
Either way, we agreed that we would go through the 'home assessment' process and proceed based on the outcomes. Meeting was adjourned and we walked out shaking as we confronted the beast head on and survived. Not only did we survive but we learned a lot and made a very powerful point with the staff and CEO. We proceeded with the home review but ran into a problem as I have no government issued ID for the RCMP security check. My refusal to get ID frustrated the social worker beyond what words could explain. She just could not comprehend why I would not get any ID. I also struggled with a lot of pain as I was torn between submitting to help him or standing my ground and risk not being able to help.
The social worker shared with us that she brought up the issue in a staff meeting one day. The issue split the room right down the middle. One group thought that I should get the ID and follow the rules, while the other group recognized my right to refuse. One of her colleagues approached her and asked her if she respected the Hutterites and Amish. She said yes. He then informed her that they don't have ID either and that I was no different by me standing on my spiritual beliefs. This helped her immensely come to terms with my stand and she then worked hard to respect my desire to not have any government issued ID. She went so far as to go to the RCMP station and work with the officers there. I joined her but remained outside the station. She came outside into the parking lot with the form. I then changed the form, crossing out words that I don't agree too and replacing them with words that protected me. There was a lot of changes to make. But I made them all and she then walked into the station with the piece of paper and the security check cleared! No government issued ID.
We went through the home assessment which was yet another challenge as we did not want to surrender any of our rights in the process. So it took some time. But eventually it was done and the young man returned for a while longer. At some point the issues were resolved with his original foster parents and he then returned to the home he knew best as a result of his own free will choice. He now had the power to choose and he exercised it AND they listened!!!! We have not seen him since and we pray he is doing well.
The Fallout
But the story is not end there. We found out that this event triggered a lot of changes in the St. Albert office. We were invited by the social worker to a meeting, our two sons and the foster boy was there as well. We sat there for an hour while the social worker wept and cried apologizing profusely to us and the boys for what happened, her actions and behaviour through the whole event. She expressed her gratitude and appreciation to me specifically for having the guts to stand up for what is write and remind her why she got into social work to begin with. She spend an hour ranting and raving about how she admired our beliefs and that we stood by them to the end. We walked out of that meeting absolutely stunned. We could not believe what we just heard. Not only did we help a young man, but we also helped a lady find her humanity and compassion for children.
We later found out from another social worker friend that this incident also caused a re-evaluation of the medication that they put the kids on. Because this young man was able to articulate his feelings and thoughts so well, they realized that FAS kids are much more intelligent and capable of expressing themselves way behind what they originally thought. As a result they drastically cut down on the medications being pumped into the kids.
I also found out that the 'director' has all the authority within the act. But I was not able to identify this individual, no matter how deep I dug into their statutes, regulations or propaganda. Seemed like this information is top secret to protect the individual who is assigned the authority of 'director'. However, inside sources told me that the CEO is the director. So if you want to hold anybody accountable, it is the CEO! The CEO is the guardian of all the kids! He is the man!!!
Yes, social services is a corporation and I suspect it is also a for profit corporation to boot, but unable to prove it at this time. So if you are struggling with social services, study the statutes and regulations. Use those documents as hand cuffs to hold these pirates accountable for their actions. Fight for the kids to give them a voice as they have a right to be heard and listened to. These kids need us to stand up and hold the agency accountable for all the violence they engage in as they destroy families in the process. Yes, they help some, but that does not justify the carnage left behind in the hearts and minds of children everywhere.
In my view, Social Services / CPS is nothing more than Residential School Version 2.0. I stand by that assessment.
One man/womb-man can make a difference! Stand up. Be heard!