QUESTION:
- How can I release extra weight?
- I have gained a lot of weight in this last month/year/lifetime and it's making me feel terrible about myself.
- I've tried many times to lose it, but by keeping the weight I stay in my (uncomfortable) comfort zone!
- And I feel almost like I can't detach from the weight.
- I feel disgusting every single day.
- How can I break the cycle?
- I'm normally good at finding answers for myself but I'm really struggling with my weight!
ANSWER:
I am a weight loss coach for morbidly obese clients who think they cannot change. I use natural methods only. The trick is start slow, build healthy habits, and keep going.
Big Changes Rarely Work
A great deal of the trouble for everyone is thinking that small change will not help so they deep dive into some fad or another, such as:
- intermittent fasting
- going vegan
- cutting out dairy
- going gluten free
- going keto
- going paleo
- paying hundreds or thousands of dollars for that special gym membership
- going to boot camp
- going crazy
It's fine if you want to do that later (except the crazy part), but get some success going with regular habits you can live with first. Let's not change everything yet. Instead we want to improve what you already do.
What is your starting point?
Let's find out where you are now. Determine if you are underweight, overweight, obese, or morbidly obese by checking your BMI here.
- Underweight = <18.5
- Normal weight = 18.5–24.9
- Overweight = 25–29.9
- Obesity = BMI of 30 - 39.9
- Morbid Obesity = 40 or greater
These BMI numbers are controversial, so I spot you two points. When I got to my goal weight in 2011, my BMI was 26. Here is how I tracked it:
As you see, I struggles for years and the answer came in 2011 with a coach who taught me skills I could implement. After I got to my goal weight in 2011, I next checked in 2013 and was at BMI 24. I wanted to be a "normal" weight for once in my long life, and so I pushed hard for a couple of months so I could be in that magical place, if even for a day.
- The photo on the left is me at my highest weight in 2008 at about BMI 47+ When I was The Fat Lady in Accounting at a meeting.
- The photo in the middle is me on the wonderful day I got to my goal (October 10, 2011) at BMI 26, when I was scared to be this new thin person.
- The photo on the right is me in March 2013 at BMI 24 when I thought I was hot stuff.
Since that time, I have been as low as 130 and as high as 160 as life happens and I fluctuate.
But:
- when I am too thin - and 135 is too thin for me now - I take steps to bulk up a bit.
And:
- when I am too large - and 155 is too large for me now - I take steps to regroup and reduce.
How do I know I need to take these steps? My underwear gets to be a little too tight, or a little too loose. This is a true joy. I used to scoff when I heard thin people say this was how they know their weight, and now it is how I know mine. The underwear test! Not the scale. Oh, happy day! I get on a scale if I see one (in public!) and it usually says what I think it will say.
In the eight years since I got to my goal weight, I have been too thin twice, and too heavy three times.
Two examples:
I had a job taking care of a hospice patient for three months until she left this world for good. I was in the next room, on call 24/7, and the food in the house was not that great. So I did not eat or sleep well, and I exercised like crazy taking care of my patient. At the end of the three months, I weighed 130 and was exhausted. I looked like I was the hospice patient; wasting away. But sometimes you have to do what you have to do.
The next job after the hospice care was live-in weight loss coaching for a family of five with an unlimited budget. They were very busy with multiple jobs for the two adults, and different schedules for each of the three kids. They requested "healthy junk food" they could eat on the go. They already had a cook/housekeeper and a lot of what I did was training her to make healthier food in the same cuisine, which was generally Mexican.
I ate like a greedy queen for 2 months and left there with the family well on their way to health, and me weighing about 155 from the shear joy of eating delicious organic junk food and luscious evening meals. Sometimes, yummy food gets the best of me even though it is healthy.
About a month later, on a reasonable diet and normal hours of working, I was back around 145 where I usually hover now. Most of the time I stay right where I want to without much effort. This is a sign of successful weight loss.
So what about you?
FOOD:
For food issues, I do not talk about calories at the outset. I work with what you eat now and make it 10% better each week. 5% less crap - 5% more nutrition. After a few weeks, you are on a roll. We will fine tune together along the way. Calories are never really much of an issue. I work with the food you normally eat and help you to make it more nutritious, and more delicious. You will not want to return to the old food once you eat in this new way.
We are Stuffed Yet Starving
The standard Western diet is high in artificial additives and low on nutrition. Both of those areas can be improved without too much trouble. This amazing fact was the most startling to me and the true game-changer once I found out how I had been fooled.
It turned out all the "diet food" I had been consuming was not healthy. Getting to a more natural diet was a learning curve and an effort, but now it is second nature and not hard to stick to at all. Paleo, vegan, vegetarian, and every other diet can be healthy or not. I will help you to find the healthy path no matter what your preference is.
And finally, do not beat yourself up. If you are in the US eating standard food, you are full of toxins you are not even aware of. Once your get rid of about half of that, you will be a new person and eager to keep going. And I am not forgetting about my international friends. I see your food and some of you can do much better while keeping pretty much the same diet.
Here is a poster I made a few years ago to help define the main issue.
You will not believe how easily all your systems will wake up when you stop hurting them and start helping them instead.
EXERCISE:
For exercise, I do not tell you to go to a gym 3 times I week. Instead work out 10 minutes a day EVERY day:
- where you are
- with what you have
- and with what you can do.
Examples of this are:
- Stretching in bed; morning and night
- Doing a few quick moves each time you get up from your work
- Dancing around to a You Tube video
Here's one! Exercise break! Do it with me now. You have been reading my words of wisdom long enough. This will be the best 2 minutes and 36 seconds of your day if not your life.
Whew! I feel better now. Don't you?
Soon your exercise sessions are 15 minutes a day and on we go until you get fit. Somewhere along the way you will find a sport or activity you love, but the first thing I start with is stretching (not yoga). Here is a short video with one of the best tips I have for stretching when you are obese.
This next video is a bit longer, but I hope you will watch it. Two years after I go to my goal, I had published my book about weight loss excuses and I was trying hard to reach out to obese people I knew to ask them to please try my methods to lose weight. I know now that this is a road to disaster.
I lost every friend and connection I had a this time. Guys were looking at me(!) for the first time in my life. Thin women thought I was trying to steal their men(!) I was a fat 4 year old and had never been thin in my life. Now I did not even know what my life was.
But the worst thing of all was that the obese people I knew would not even look at my work, and that was breaking my heart.
I know now that I cannot help anyone who is not ready to try. I hope you are one of them. Please watch this video and see if my words resonate with you.
Fat, fat, fat ruled my life until I lost weight at 50. I was so sick by the time I started to lose weight that people who knew me told me they expected me to be dead - not thin. I am 58 now and have never had trouble with my weight again. Anyone can do this if I did.
I believe in you until you can believe in yourself. My coaching works. You have nothing to lose but the weight.
What Next?
Here are some ideas.
- Read back to my last weight loss post. Think about where you are now and where you want to be. Write it down. If you lose one pound a week, when are you getting to your goal?
- Check your BMI write that down too. How far are you from "normal?"
- If you feel like you just can't lose weight now, consider buying my book about weight loss excuses. It's not long and may be the jump start you need. If not now, give yourself a date to start. This is your one and only life as far as we know. Don't be like me, in fear of dying fat. Get yourself a date and let's do this.
My next weight loss post is post coming soon. I'm working to make my coaching work digestible in a blog format. I do not want to overwhelm you. I want to help you succeed. If I was your one-on-one coach in person or online, I would be doing a lot of work for you. Out here on my blog, I need to write so that you can help yourself. Ask questions or comment on this post. I want to hear from you.
Contact me:
If you have anything to say that you do not feel comfortable posting here, please contact me at:
I answer all pm's and will connect with anyone who asks me.
If you are interested in one-on-one coaching, I want to work with you.
I offer packages, designed for you, in 1 month, 3 month, or 6 month terms; renewable.
Live In
I am currently in Bangkok Thailand and available to relocate.
- Food services are negotiable and range from full shopping and meal prep, to working with your staff, to acting as a coach to help you learn for yourself.
- Exercise help is offered daily on your schedule and based on your fitness level.
- Motivation help and planning will help you continue to succeed when I am gone.
- Remote follow up is available and negotiable.
Online
Normal services are back and forth by email 3X per week with 1 or 2 online sessions per week. I have many resources, worksheets, videos, and tutorials and they will be offered as we agree together and in line with your needs. This depends upon you and your time availability.
All pricing negotiable upon consultation.
I accept PayPal and all major cryptocurrencies.
If you are on Steemit, both SBD and STEEM are accepted. Delegated SP in partial payment is a possibility we can discuss.