What Do you Need to be Happy?
A delightful topic brought up by Alex @eco-alex.
The moment I read I had a smile on my face, so to think of it just the word Happy brings happiness. So much of positive energy in the word itself.
I will write this article in 2 sections; 1 where I feel happiness is our basic nature and we actually should not need any support systems to be Happy and the other being what actually brings me a lot of happiness.
Definition of Happiness is very subjective, sometimes we look for it outward and there are times when we are happy just by ourselves. To think of it happiness is a part of us and our basic nature. We do not need support systems to be in a state of joy and bliss. We ourselves can be bundle of Joy.
We go for a nice dinner we feel happy. Ok the mood next day is also good since we have spent some good time, but day after that the pleasantness is off and again back to the rut. A small car accident on the road and we are off for the whole day or may be couple of days. A recognition at work and we are at the top of the world. Boss fires and the whole world comes crashing down.
So is life all about this I mean "Living Externally". I will not say 100% but OK I can say around 80% of people are living life "Externally". When I say Externally what does it mean, it means all our happiness, joy, sorrow come from external experiences.
Is that wrong?
I do not think so. We are born with the 5 senses which are a part of us and the function of these senses is to give us different emotions. But now where the problem lies is what is a so called part of us, we have become part of it. So let me elaborate further.
The whole experience of life is made outward. something happens we feel happy, something doesn't happen we feel sad and our happiness completely depends on external factors. Life experiences play a major role for us.
It happens almost with everyone, though after understanding the basics of life it is not always very easy and practical to follow. There are times when the Heart gets in full command and be it whatever the mind thinks, it overwrites.
Coming to this question personally for me; if I have to think externally what brings happiness to me then there there are like loads of things coming to my mind that brings happiness to me like the most important My family, Friends, Crystals, Books, Angel figures, Being around with Children, Music, Flowers, Chocolates, Chocolate Icecream, Chocolate Mousse..... ohhhh my I just want to have it right away, My favorite Chicken Tandoori, White wine, Sunsets, Being around the Sea, Travelling, long drives, Watching movies, A walk in the Nature, Yoga, Writing, Clubbing out with friends, Dancing, Beer, and almost all the good things of life....ohhhh my this list doesn't seem to get over.
But above all of these there is one that overwrites all and brings the most profound experience of happiness to me and that's my SON
I became a mother at a very young age, when I was 22, The environment that I was brought up in barely had given me an opportunity to understand the feelings of Love and Happiness. I never knew that there can be someone in our life who we can love wholeheartedly and selflessly and just the presence will alter your life untill my Son was born. I cannot express the joy I felt in my heart that day when the first time I held my son and kissed him and from that very day till now I have the same feeling with his presence in my life and also for my overall life.
When he is around the whole world seems to be different. He has filled up all the empty spaces of my life. When he was born I had decided that I will fulfill all his wishes and give him the best childhood days, I did managed to do that and I feel like I have accomplished something very big in life. I have never hit my son till date even with a slap, and I remember there must be just couple of times when I was angry with him. Yes you can say I have pampered him a lot, and there was a reason, when he was growing up, I used to observe he was a extra sensitive kid. He would get hurt very fast and would never speak out, he would store that in his heart, and I never wanted that when he would grow up he has any kind of childhood bad memories or trauma, like I had. And to an extent I feel he understands my feelings at a soul level and he has never tried to take any wrong advantage of it, rather he always acknowledges all that I have done for him.
Now he is a grown up boy of 21 and he sometimes behaves like a Father to me giving advice, or there are times when he fights like a Brother to me, and there are times when he is just like a good friend giving me company. There are times when we have some heated arguments and will not talk to each other for a day, but he will always come and make up and then both of us will end up crying for being rude to each other. This is the best part of our relation.
He is a very matured boy for his age and there are many times when I look upto him for advice as he tells me "Mom you go too much with your Heart and less with your Mind". He is now into full time Crypto Trading, also working on Conspiracy Theories and a DJ as a hobby. He gives me and my husband all the guidance on our Crypto Investments, manages our portfolios and always makes sure his Mom is progressing....hehehe. I feel very very proud of him and so grateful that he chose me to be his Mother. Sometimes I feel he is my Soulmate and he has come into my life to make me a better person. From the last 3 years we are living in different countries but we both make sure that every alternate month we stay together for a few days.
My Son has helped me heal from my Childhood traumas and pain by giving me an opportunity fill up all those empty spaces of my childhood in his own and his extra sensitive nature always kept me soft and emotional towards him which inturn also helped me change overall as a person. Today with his presence in my life I feel that I am the most blessed and the happiest person. It's not also about his physical presence, there are times when we do not get to talk to each other for some days and I do not believe that if I see him or talk to him only then I will feel happy, it's just his presence in my life that gives me this complete feeling of joyfulness and makes me a Happy person, allowing me to see good in every situation of life.
Ohh my god, I am already so emotional. This is my way of saying Gratitude to my Son and the Universe for giving me such a beautiful gift and making me the most Happiest person.
To summarize it up
Happiness is a choice that you can make, based on what matters most for you.
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