Confusing Earth - Chapter 9: Reliable

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Chapter 9: Reliable

Jack, Maree, Max, Liam and Bella looked around in the phone place. Jack picked up a small phone.
“So this piece of technology is a mobile phone” said Jack, “Funny they made it so small. You would think they would make it big and huge and triple good.”
“Well it wouldn’t be very mobile if it was huge” said Maree. Jack mused for a moment.
“Good point” he said. A man came up to Jack.
“Can I help you sir?” he asked.
“Yes” said Jack, “I want to exchange money for a mobile phone. Can you recommend one?”

An hour later of recommendations and discussion, they were walking and limping out of the phone shop, with Jack with a phone which required a lot of money to be exchanged which could do things he thought was cool even though he didn’t know what any of those things were.
“It’s cool” said Jack, “It’s got a thing that makes your teeth blue. I only just found out that these things were called teeth from the Joy of Earth book and now I find out you can get them in different colours. I thought they only came in white and yellow”.
“Can you stop bragging?” asked Liam, “I don’t have any teeth to do cool stuff with.”
“Sorry” said Jack, “But it’s cool. You can do something call download on it too. I can’t wait to find out what that is.”
“Can you communicate with people?” asked Max.
“Yes of course” said Jack. He looked at his unusual cool new device. He frowned as he looked at it.
“Somehow” he said.
“Here, I can call our friend” said Bella. Bella pulled her new basic phone out of the nappy bag.
“Not yet” said Jack, “We need to wait a bit first. That’s how you hook them in. Make them wait and want to see us.”
“Okay, let’s go then” said Bella, putting the phone away. Everyone started to walk off. Jack looked at his mobile phone and at all the functions on it. He grunted as he fumbled with the buttons trying to work out how to communicate with humans through it. Bella, Liam, Maree and Max looked back at Jack from a distance.
“Come on Eileen” yelled Max. Jack looked up, frowned and moved as fast as he could on crutches towards them. Jack caught up to Max and grabbed him on the shoulder.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked, “Are you picking on my broken leg?”
“Well, yes that” said Max, “And the fact you look like a female.”
“I do not look like a female” snapped Jack.
“Jack” said Max, “Have you noticed the only people wearing a long thing like you are females?”
“That’s not true” said Jack.
“Look around” said Max. Jack, Max, Maree, Bella and Liam all stopped to watch the people walking by.
“Oh no” squealed Jack, “You’re right. I’m dressed like a female. I need to get changed right now.” Jack started to pull his long thing off.
“No” yelled Bella, “Not right here Jack.” Jack stopped and looked at Bella and then his family and then everyone walking past.
“Okay, maybe you’re right” said Jack, “But we need to quickly find some other clothes. I can’t be dressed like a female. It’s just wrong.”
So they kept walking through the mall and eventually stopped outside a shop with jeans and shirts in it. They went in there. Jack grabbed the first pair of pants and shirt he found and rushed into the change room as fast as he crutches could take him. He got changed and came out with those clothes on, with tags still on. He went to the counter and spoke to the young lady at the counter.
“I would like to purchase these clothes I am wearing, thank you” he said.
“Well, I’m glad they fit you sir” said the lady, “But can you please take them off so that they can be scanned.”
“Well if you really want” said Jack and he started to undo the jeans. The lady quickly put her arms up in a panicky crossing motion.
“No” she said, “Not out here. Don’t you have any shame?”
“What’s that?” asked Jack.
“Never mind” she said, “Go back into the change room and put your old clothes back on.”
“There’s no way I’m doing that” stated Jack, “I was wearing clothes for females. I can’t wear clothes for females. And you know it’s really unfair. You are wearing pants and a shirt. Why do you get to wear that but males can’t wear your snobby, elitist female only clothes? It’s double standards and it is just completely idiotic and double annoying.”
“Well sir, you can wear dresses if you want” explained the lady at the counter, “but then you would be a drag queen.”
“I don’t know what that is” said Jack, “But it is still wrong you females get more options than us. I’m going to start a group to get males equal options I think.”
The girl rolled her eyes, looking at this possible lunatic in her shop.
“Fine” she said, “Leave the clothes on. Just let me get to the tags.”
“Where are these tags you speak of?” asked Jack.
“One is at the top of your pants at the back, hanging out a bit and one is at the top of your shirt, hanging down also at the back” said the lady.
“Okay” said Jack. He spun around, laid his crutches against the side of the register and sat on the register, cross legged.
“You didn’t need to get that close” said the lady, scanning the tag on his pants. Jack responded by leaning backwards till he was nearly leaning on her, so she could reach the tag on his shirt. She scanned it and stepped sideways to use the computer. Without her behind him for support, Jack fell backwards and off of the register and onto the floor. He looked up at the lady. She looked down at him and then passed him his crutches.
“That’s all today is it?” she said dryly, “Please tell me you didn’t buy any underwear too.”
“No that’s all” moaned Jack, from the floor.
“Okay, that is forty two dollars and sixty five cents” said the lady. She grabbed his hand and helped him up and Jack got onto his crutches. He paid the lady her money and left. His long thing lay behind on the dressing room floor. Jack left the shop and Max was standing just outside.

Jack went up to Max.
“Max I need to talk to you” said Jack.
“Gee, what have I done now to insult you or the institute?” asked Max.
“Nothing” said Jack, “I actually wanted to thank you Max. I know we don’t get along and I can’t really help the way I feel that way. Your lifestyle is not compatible with my lifestyle within the institute. Your lifestyle is even an insult to the institute and all I stand for.”
“Jack” said Max, “Is this you thanking me?”
“Oh right, sorry, I’ll get to the point” said Jack, “I know we don’t get along perfectly but the point is we are together now and we are a family and you have been really helpful throughout this whole experience. I mean, running away from home wasn’t the best thing you could have done, but you have done quite a bit else that is good. You helped us find a mobile phone, you helped me realise I looked like a fool and a female rather than letting me go along like that and you are nice to your mother figure. I want to thank you for putting our issues aside to help the mission, private. Despite my own Banbazoidian feelings, you have been really reliable and I thank you for that a lot. You are doing a good job, private.”
Max looked at Jack, looking for any sign of deceit or laughter. He wasn’t lying. He was serious.
“Thank you Jack” said Max, “I’m glad I could help. Though to be honest, I possibly could have told you about the long thing a bit earlier.”
“That’s okay” said Jack, “You told me before everyone in the mall saw me. At least I don’t think everyone has seen me yet. Thank you son.”
“That’s okay” said Max. Max and Jack looked ahead to see Maree, Bella and Liam sitting on a bottom holding device in the middle of the mall. They walked and crutched over to them. Bella stood up, holding onto Liam. “Okay, you guys ready to go get some nutrition and a leg fur removing device and anything else we need?” asked Bella.
“Sure are” said Jack and he kissed Bella. Bella blushed.

They walked to a big shop that had aisles of nutrition and other stuff in it. They soon dispersed throughout the shop. Bella found a packet of leg fur removing devices and put in the square carrying thing which had a thing to hold it with that she attached her hand to. She continued looking and found some square packets sitting together. Curiously, she picked one up.
“Regular with wings” she read. She looked at Liam who was in her opposite arm to the one carrying the square thing.
“Something that makes you fly” whispered Liam, “That would be good.”
“It might be like the wings on our spaceships” mused Bella, quietly. She looked up the top of the packet and the packet crinkled as she touched it.
“14 pads” she read, “Let’s get some. These flying pads may come in handy.” Bella placed the packet of pads in the square carrying thing.

Meanwhile Jack and Maree were carrying square carrying things around and had collected an odd assortment of items. Jack had a basket full of things from an aisle labelled confectionery. Jack did not know what confectionery was but he grabbed a heap of things that appeared to be nutrition covered in colouring packaging and some purple thin boxes of similar nutrition. Jack looked at the purple thin boxes and then at Maree.
“I think we have enough nutrition to last us a while” he said. Maree and Jack continued to walk and came across a section full of nutrition holding clear containment devices that were next to each other and had a silver thing which it would appear would be for scooping the nutrition out of the devices. They went over to them and had a look. They saw containment devices labelled macadamia nuts, mixed lollies and one labelled flour. Jack opened the one labelled flour and asked for Maree’s square carrying thing which was empty. Jack put the silver thing into the containment device and scooped out a scoopful of flour. He then tipped the scoopful straight into the square carrying thing. The flour went straight through the gaps in the square carrying thing and went all over the floor. Jack and Maree looked down at it and then ran or crutched really fast away. They stopped at the end of another aisle, breathing heavily.
“Do you think the authorities saw us make that mess?” breathed Jack.
“I think we’re safe” said Maree, “That was close.”

Finally, everyone met up near the checkouts. Everyone had at least one item to exchange for money. Jack had his confectionery nutrition and some white stuff he believed to be juice from an animal, Max had a print communication like a book but thinner with females on it, Maree had some round things called oranges, Bella had her fur removal device and her pads, a tin of something called baby formula and a packet of nappies for Liam and Liam had a sucking device. They all watched people at the checkout and followed their actions. They put all of their stuff up on the black moving things on the checkout. Jack jiggled from one foot to another before crossing his legs over each other, relying on his underarms to cling to his crutches for support. He grabbed some money out of his bit of cloth attached to his pants which he put stuff in and threw it at Maree. “You buy the stuff” he said, “I’ve gotta go.” Maree stared at Jack quickly hobbled off. Before they reached the other side of the checkout, Jack was gone.

PREVIOUS CHAPTERS
Chapter 8: Caressing: @birchmark/confusing-earth-chapter-8-caressing

Chapter 7: Shades: @birchmark/confusing-earth-chapter-7-shades

Chapter 6: Wonder: @birchmark/confusing-earth-chapter-6-wonder

Chapter 5: Stepping: @birchmark/confusing-earth-chapter-5-stepping

Chapter 4: Stench: @birchmark/confusing-earth-chapter-4-stench

Chapter 3: Value: @birchmark/confusing-earth-chapter-3-value

Chapter 2: Launch: @birchmark/confusing-earth-chapter-2-launch

Chapter 1: Splash : @birchmark/confusing-earth-chapter-1-splash

LINKS
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