I'm sorry I took you to that place (freewrite)

Luke throws the bag of groceries to the ground, yet nothing happens, there is no shift inside his small world, in his new, squeaky clean apartment. No, it's not clean, it's sterile. He can't sleep and the smell of mildew is keeping him up at night. Funny, how he can only smell it at night, but that's how things are now. The nights draw long and he often finds himself pacing up and down, in their room. Ah, but every room is their room, isn't it? There's not an inch of this apartment that he can call his own and that's fine, that's just fine.
He waits, allows the silence and the dust to settle and crouches to pick up the groceries that have flown off in all directions. He finds himself hoping that nothing's broken, because they can't afford the waste.
Maybe she's not here – he can't bring himself to call this place 'home' – today. She's always here, but maybe not today. Perhaps something has happened, perhaps she's realized what a colossal mistake this was. Maybe she's packed her bags and scooted away from him, from everything. It'd be what he deserves.
Luke tries to tell himself it's not also what he wants, but fails. With the groceries in his arms, he heads through the house that they live in – because they couldn't live back there anymore, not after what they'd done. Besides, Cherry never really had much of a place to begin with. He enters the kitchen, and she's there, chopping away with her back at him. She doesn't even turn to look at him, as he enters and slams the food on the counter, but he can see a small flinch in her shoulders, her only acknowledgment of him.
He catches a glimpse of what she has in her hand and it sends him over the edge – an edge he was so eager to go over, to begin with. If he was to tell the truth, he'd have to admit he'd been looking for a chance to snap at her all day, like he did most days. But nobody has to tell the truth and Luke definitely doesn't want to.

'Again with those damn herbs,' he spits the words through his teeth. He spits at her and every fleck and syllable is brimming over with his hate and contempt. He does not want her anymore. In this moment now, he can't for the life of him understand how he ever could.
'They're healthy,' she says, quietly. She's become so quiet lately, a far cry from the fiery woman he'd met all those months ago. Now, she only speaks when it's necessary, which he so eagerly takes for a mutual feeling. Mutual contempt. But he knows that's not true, he knows it every time she looks at him.
He sees in Cherry's eyes love, all that unbearable love, and it makes him hate her even more. She's so desperate to give him so much, she needs him so, she's so eager to love him.
'They're all we ever eat,' he growls.
'We need to eat them,' she just shakes her head, like it's out of her hands. 'Your mother said we should eat them.'
And for that one second, Luke is glad he put the groceries down, otherwise he would've thrown it all at her head. 'What do you mean?'
'She came to me in a dream. Just like she did with you, she told me to stock up on these, because we need to –'
'I'm not laughing, Cherry,' he cuts her off and his hands are around her, spinning her around to face him. She lets out a little cry of shock and drops the knife on the floor.
'But I'm not joking, Luke,' she doesn't understand, he can see that, but he doesn't let her go. She talks to him, probably repeating herself, but he doesn't hear another word. He hasn't been able to sleep properly for weeks, let alone dream and yet, she sees his mother? His mother, whom he hasn't seen since that night, when he found Cherry, when she lied to him once again. She'd said there was nothing more she knew, no way she could help him and yet here she was now, talking to Cherry about wild herbs?
He knew Cherry wouldn't lie, wouldn't play with him and yet, he couldn't bring himself to let go of her.
He feels her belly pressing against his and that stops him. He looks up to meet her eyes and there's a flash of lightning in there. She'd never hurt him, not if she could help it, but he sees now that she'd never allow him to endanger her child, either. Their child, he thinks, bitterly. He stoops to kiss her round belly.
I love you, he thinks.
Then he straightens his back, taking his hands off her. 'I hate you,' he whispers, looking Cherry in the eyes. And he walks away.