Would you risk your life for free groceries? I just witnessed someone who would. Maybe he was desperate, maybe he was only desperate to NOT be caught. I'll never find out. 

Here's the Story (and some GIFs to go along with it!)

I work part-time at a grocery store. Gotta pay those bills somehow, right?

Our loss-prevention (LP) floor walker spotted a suspicious young man stuffing groceries into his sweater. 

It was suspicious enough that he was wearing a sweater! It's hot out. The suspect, who couldn't be more than 25, bypassed the cashiers and walked straight out the front door. Oh, he must have thought he looked like an innocent angel. That his confident strut was soooo convincing. 

They're not onto me, right?

At this point, LP confronted him with one of my managers and attempted to arrest him. 

The accused bolted. 

He ran like his life depended on it. He ran with the tunnel vision of a greyhound (look it up). 

He ran without looking both ways before crossing the...

Ouch.

He flipped over the hood and cracked his skull off of the steel storm drain. There was blood everywhere.

He tried to get up. You could hear the bones crack as he attempted to lift his head. One of my coworkers told him he'd better not try to move. All the man could say in response was, "PLEASE!!! DON'T CALL THE COPS!! DON'T ARREST ME!!!"

I think that's the least of your concerns right now, friend. 

Now, do you want to know what he went through all this trouble for?

Do you want to know what he stole?

This.

A four dollar tub of yogurt.

Kids, don't risk your life for a few dollars worth of vanilla-flavoured dairy product. It isn't worth it.

LP and my manager felt really bad about what happened. They seemed really shaken-up. My coworker told them not to lose sleep over it. They weren't the ones who decided to steal. They weren't the ones who decided to run. They weren't the ones who decided to dart into traffic without looking. 

They weren't the ones who decided to risk their lives over yogurt.

~Seth

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