This post is part of my book Conspire To Inspire: Everything Is Awesome When You Are Part Of A Team

Michael Paine @strangerarray

Copyright © 2015 Michael Paine

3 DALE CARNEGIE

Dale

Dale “was an American writer and lecturer and the developer of famous courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking, and interpersonal skills. Born into poverty on a farm in Missouri, he was the author of How to Win Friends and Influence People (1936), a massive bestseller that remains popular today. He also wrote How to Stop Worrying and Start Living (1948)”. If you have not read these books at least once, just stop reading this and go read them. I have read How to Win Friends and Influence People multiple times and learn and re-learn every time I do. The stories are motivating and the message is positive. Who wants more friends? Who wants to influence people? I know I do. I hope you do as well. It seems that most people do. But usually they go about their life in a self-centered way. This gets them the opposite results of what they truly want. If you are not getting what you want in life, you are probably going about it the wrong way.

When did I first hear about Dale Carnegie? Was it in one of the several business classes I took in high school? Was it during a lecture in college? What about during my graduate studies in an MBA program? Nope. Nope. And nope. I first heard about Dale Carnegie after having a few drinks at a party with some friends during my early years of college. I am not even sure that my friend discussed Dale with me but merely mentioned him and had the book on hand. Which he then handed me and I still have that copy today. I first glanced at the table of contents of the book as I flipped the first few pages while stepping into the restroom. It seemed to have things that I would be interested in I thought as I zipped up. I decided then and there to go ahead and read the rest of the book. I am not sure my friend meant to give me his book, but I took it.

The stories at first seemed a little antiquated given the time period of the writing. However, the principles still rang true with suggestions such as: Don't criticize, condemn, or complain; Give honest and sincere appreciation; Become genuinely interested in other people; Smile; Remember that a person's name is, to that person, the sweetest and most important sound in any language; and so on and so forth. Any one of those lessons that I applied to my life lead to immediate and direct positive results. I was instantly more winsome and influential.

Secondly, if you have a past like me you have worried about things. I have lain in bed at night with thoughts racing at a hundred miles a minute. Which is fast. Plus who were they racing and to where? But I digress. The point is that I would not fall asleep for the longest time. I would just be thinking. Thinking about what I had done in the past. What I had done that day. What I will do tomorrow. What I forgot. What I hope happens. I would go through various interactions and scenes. Real and imaginary. My emotions would get all worked up and I was a mess. Try sleeping now when your heart is racing and you are crying.

It was a long road coming to the place where I am now. To be direct I still do worry from time to time and need to get a little better each day at stopping it. However, I did not start making real progress in this area until I read Dale's book How to Stop Worrying and Start Living. Now you might be asking “Can reading a book really lead to you stopping worry.” For you I don't know. For me the answer is “YES”! Again I thought the material would be a little antiquated. Which some points were. But on the whole the suggestions held up well to the test of time. A few of the 16 ways this book will help you from the inside front cover: Gives you a number of practical, tested formulas for solving worry situations; Shows you how to lessen financial worries; Shows you how to avoid emotional upsets; and Gives you the stories of scores of everyday people, who tell you in their own words how they stopped worrying and started living.

These stories were an inspiration to me and a guide. The fact that I was not alone in my problem was a good way to put my life into perspective in the bigger picture of existence. Also the knowledge that worry could and had been overcome was life changing. I now felt like I had a chance at finally getting some sleep! So even though Dale is no longer with us, given that he died nearly 30 years before I was even born, he continues to have a lasting impact on the world today.

Dale's legacy lives on through Dale Carnegie Training.

“Founded in 1912, Dale Carnegie Training has evolved from one man's belief in the power of self-improvement to a performance-based training company with offices worldwide. We focus on giving people in business the opportunity to sharpen their skills and improve their performance in order to build positive, steady, and profitable results.”

I have not ever actually used any of the Dale Carnegie Training programs but think it may be worth looking into.

The choice is yours.

CTI