One of my frequent sayings is "Keep your smile on" and I often encourage people to be happy. This whole philosophy of happiness is just that, a way to a happy living, but there is a catch. Today I will try to explain why is it unproductive, unhealthy and ill-advisable to fake your smiles and your mood. For those of you who like to read, read on, and for you who prefer listening, just click play.
I know, hearing me try to pronounce the word "gastroenterologists" was the best thing you heard all day, It was funny to me too :)
It is OK not to be OK
There are no good and bad emotions, and whatever you feel is important just as it is important to let those feelings out. IT is perfectly normal that you sometimes get sad, and sometimes angry. The biggest mistake you can make is to fake it and pretend like everything is fine. You are an emotional being and you react to your circumstances and surroundings. No one is happy all the time. A lot of people lie about it and pretend that they are but they are not. Be sad and be angry, feel those emotions completely, just don't stay in that state. The more you ignore them the bigger they get.
I have seen people trying to be happy 24/7 and then get really bad for not being able to do it. They feel a little sad and then get depressed for feeling sad or they get a little angry and become furious at themselves for feeling angry. Don't do that, don't beat yourself up for being a human, because that is what you are, a human. There is a difference between feeling bad in the moment and feeling bad all the time. The thing you should do is
try to feel better.
Do not wear a mask over your emotions and do not try to ignore them.
A journey to feeling better
If you are depressed in one second you will not be enthusiastic in the next one. That is a big emotional jump that you can not take so don't even try. What you can do is feel a little better in every moment that comes. There are emotions that will give you a relief from those which you were feeling just a moment ago. For example, if you are depressed, an emotion that will make it easier for you is anger, you will feel a little weight come off your shoulders and be better. Your journey up the emotional scale can be longer or shorter, depending on how strong are your feelings. If you feel just a little sad, you can be very happy very soon, but if you are diagnosed with a clinical depression don't get even more depressed for not being able to pick yourself up right away. It is a process and you are doing fine by being better with each new day.
I mentioned relief earlier and how different emotions will give it to you, and I have mentioned in the beginning of this post that there are no bad or good emotions. No one will give you a medal if you are smiling all day. You can not say that bad feelings are not productive and good for humankind, some of the best works of art were born out of sadness and sorrow. Why do we, and why do I, then promote philosophy of happiness and try to teach people how to live happy lives? Because happiness has the highest frequency and gives you the most relief. You can even say that relief is the only constant in emotions. When we are saying that some feelings are bad and some good, we are talking about the relief they give you because there is not a single emotion that is good or bad. They are all important and valuable.
Your GOAL is IMPROVEMENT. Feel better and better with each passing moment.
What happens when you FAKE it?
It is important to state the obvious sometimes. Your health will reflect on your faking. The first organ that will take a punch is your stomach. The stomach is very sensitive to stress and gastroenterologists around the world will advise you that you need to change your diet but MUST change your life in order to be healthy again.
Our digestion of food is connected with our digestion of emotions.
People who are loud when they get angry or those who use swear words, sports or any other method, to express their feelings are not the ones who have digestion problems. Those people who are faking it are in trouble. When you are suppressing your feelings and ignoring them, you are not making them go away but tying them in a knot.
"Digestion is controlled by the enteric nervous system, a system composed of hundreds of millions of nerves that communicate with the central nervous system. When stress activates the "flight or fight" response in your central nervous system, digestion can shut down because your central nervous system shuts down blood flow, affects the contractions of your digestive muscles, and decreases secretions needed for digestion. Stress can cause inflammation of the gastrointestinal system, and make you more susceptible to infection." SOURCE: Everyday Health
And what is stress? Bottled emotions, a knot that you tied.
You CAN be all that you WANT to be
Take it easy. You are capable and strong enough to be the best that you can be. You have that power in you. Strive for the best and be positive in every moment. Being positive is not the same as being happy. You can be depressed and positive actually because being positive means you have hope, will, courage and determination to be better than you are now. Try to be happy whenever you can but most importantly strive for happiness. Decide that positivity and happiness will become a part of your being and that you will look at life through new eyes, honest and happy eyes. Keep your smile on, but don't fake it. It is better to admit that you are not ok and try to be better than it is to pretend that you are ok and suffer the consequences of faking it.
Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it is about learning how to dance in the rain.
There is something good in every situation, even if it is just a lesson to be learned. Do not be afraid to enjoy life and have fun. Your life is here for you to live it, not watch it go by.
Highlights of today's video
In this video I have covered the following:
accepting all of our emotions
why faking is bad for you
emotional scale
winner of the best comment to the previous video: @maxabit
made a question for all of you to answer and get a chance to win 1 SBD
For more information about what philosophy of happiness is and some posts that I have made on this subject please follow these links: