(This photo is from a totally separate trip to Hawaii, but my brother is making a pizza in the background so it seemed relevant.)
"Pineapple? With white sauce?" I wrinkle my nose with uncertainty. I'm usually the first one to suggest pineapple as a pizza topping, but this seems an unusual combination.
"Yeah, why not?" Nash asks. "It's different, it's fun. Let's order it!"
He's right: what better place to put pineapple on everything than Hawaii?*
Nash rings up the pizza parlor on speakerphone. When he gets to the part of the order about adding pineapple, the pizza guy's aghast tone is a perfect mirror of my own: "On a white pizza?!" I burst out laughing.
Thirty minutes later, we enter the tiny Giannotto's Pizzaria in the quiet residential town of Wailuku.
"We're here for a pickup?"
The owner, Dave, grins in greeting. "So you're the ones with the weird pizza!"
We start to argue over the validity of the combination when he shushes us with a single sentence: "Let's consult the Bible."
Nash and I exchange a quizzical look as Dave leaves the counter and heads out to his car. On his return, he thumps a book on a table.
FLAVOR BIBLE, it proclaims with authority.
We sit down at the table, serious as lawyers prepping for a case. Flipping through the book to Pineapple, we run a finger down its list of compatible flavors, seeking Garlic or Alfredo or Milk. Hmm, they're not there.
We even cross-reference, searching for Pineapple under Garlic, to no avail.
The Bible has spoken. Pineapple and White Sauce are an unholy pair.
We carry the pizza box down the middle of darkened neighborhood streets and trespass briefly through the jungle, honing in on the roar of the waves for the trip's first picnic on the beach. (Fun fact: all of Hawaii's shorelines below high tide line are public access.)
Perched on a narrow stretch of damp sand with a cliff to our backs and the stars overhead, we eat our blasphemous pizza.
The slices have gone cold by now, which makes the morsels of pineapple all the sweeter against the blander backdrop of garlic and ricotta cheese.
It's strange, but not bad.
The tiramisu, however, tastes heavenly - it probably followed all the biblical decrees.
*PSA: There is such a thing as too much pineapple!!! After only ten days on the island, my mouth was full of sores. It turns out the bromelain in fresh pineapple breaks down the proteins in your tissues. One guy we met claims he actually developed an allergy to pineapple after moving to the island. So enjoy your pineapple in moderation!
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Thanks for reading! Sorry for the lack of anything resembling good photography for this one. As always all words and photos are mine.
- Katie, @therovingreader