Notes From an Amateur Writer #32
IT'S SHOW AND TELL TIME
This Blog series is an exercise in creative writing. Sometimes expressed in short story forms, sometimes as a journal, or just my thoughts written down. This is my attempt to help coalesce my writing ideas and knowledge into usable form. It is a nursery of sorts for the stories that are on their way, or yet to be written.
Let Me Tell You a Story
I sat at the table, staring across at the man facing me. He wore a dark suit, his tie slightly loosened. His hands were resting near the edge of the table, as if awaiting further orders. His eyes gave little away, gazing at me blankly, like two loose discs hovering in mid air. His body language however, it told me more than I think he intended. He felt panic. That much I could sense.
"So how much longer is it going to be?" he asked.
"It shouldn't be too much longer. But I'm not in control of these things."
"You told me it would be finished by now. I can't afford to have this take any longer. I think they are onto me. I feel like they're watching me. You need to hurry up." He looked at me angrily.
The Internal Director
Cut, cut, cut.
"Woah, who said that? Who just called cut on my writing session. I was just getting into that. First draft, a bit rough, but going somewhere."
I said that.
"And who are you?"
Your internal movie director. I was watching over the words you were writing, and they were going well. Well enough anyway. Until that last word.
"Angrily? What was wrong with that?"
Okay, this is going to hurt me more than it will hurt you. But it's for your own benefit.
He slapped me across the back of the head. "Jesus, man. What's wrong with you?" He slapped me again. The force of his hand made my head jerk forwards, crashing into the desk. I wanted to grab him by the scruff, and let him know just how pissed off I felt. Give him a taste of his own medicine. Except he wasn't real. He was just another imaginary critter floating through my internal writer's world. He had slapped me, and then retreated. I wanted to throttle him.
A deep belly laugh emerged from the shadows. I could see his eyes peering out at me. 'Seeing' your response to my aggression was so much more interesting than being 'told' you were angry. Wouldn't you agree?
It's Show and Tell Time
'Show, don't tell' is one of those pieces of writing advice that gets thrown out at writers a lot. Like all rules it has its uses. It exists for a reason. But like all rules, breakages are allowed. But how do you break a rule if you have yet to master the art of applying it correctly?
I have a tendency to drift into too much tell in my writing. I am aware of that. But knowing that, or being told that, is not the same as seeing it and completely understanding where I am telling too much, and how to fix it.
My Kindle recently made a book recommendation to me based on other books I have read. It was 'Understanding Show, Don't Tell (And Really Getting It)' by Janice Hardy. The recommendation arrived at a time when this particular issue has been at the forefront of my mind. So I made a purchase and proceeded to read through it. And I am glad that I did. The book 'shows' what this rule really means and the way in which to apply it for better writing. I love the irony in that. Imagine reading a book on 'Show, Don't Tell' that is all tell. I am sure those books exist. Fortunately this wasn't one of them. And it has made a difference, because I was able to 'see' what this rule actually means, how to apply it, and when to use it and when not to use it.
I will be doing a review post for this book so I don't want to go any further into the specifics of it here, but it has broadened my thinking in this area through it's properly structured and applied explanations of this rule.
I haven't done any formal writing courses or study. I finished High School twenty-seven years ago, so even though I was good at English classes, they were some time ago. And given that I went to an inner city Government school the curriculum wasn't of a very high standard. I got through all of my schooling without ever reading Shakespeare, with minimum lessons in grammar, and never learning what an adverb was. So being 'told' to not use adverbs was far more confusing than being 'shown' what they are and why – in most cases, but certainly not all – I shouldn't use them.
What this particular book taught me more than anything was why some writing is flat, leaving the reader feeling detached. I do that, and so do other writers, including published authors. Whereas before I had a gut feeling to go on about why a particular piece of writing wasn't working as well as it could, now the specifics have a kind of visual certainty to them.
The Sith Lord Returns
You've learned a powerful lesson there, Padawan.
"You condescending bastard." I slapped him with my open hand, throwing his head to the side. I gave him a subtle smirk. That felt good.
He looked at me angrily. I could see rage creeping into the corners of his eyes, his fingers beginning to twitch. There was menace in his glare, but it was hollow. What he wanted was to respond in kind, but would he? He faded back into the shadows.
One all. I heard his voice echoing out from the depths. I guess he'll be back. If he wants the final word. Well let him bring it then – I'll 'show' him.
All images used with permission, and sourced from Unsplash.com.
Thank you for taking the time to read this. If you liked it then please like, comment, and follow
@naquoya
Short Fiction:
Bang Bang You're Dead
I Have No Name and I Must Scream
The Last Book Store
The Judge
The Man In The Mirror
The End of the World [Part 1] [Part 2]
The Locked Room
The Gods of Love and War [Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3]
Crossroads
Heart's a Mess
Blasphemous
Jonathan and the Dance of the Leaves