My husband Jared and I were separated for 9 months or so a couple of years ago. During that time I dated a man named Eugene. It actually got pretty serious. In our first conversation he asked me if I would be okay dating someone who has female friends. He went on to tell me that his best friend was a social worker and her name was Laura. He joked that he tells her he doesn't like social workers, they have too much power, but her excuse was, "We have supervisors." Yeah, best friends. Laura was the one who told him to tell me to call a social worker when I found out that Jared was doing meth. It's a long story. You can read my previous story about his recovery, and the recovery of our family here You can also read about my previous experience with social services here
Anyway, he talked about Laura often. She would come and visit him at work, and they would have lunch together every now and then. I didn't really mind, there were no sexual relations going on or anything like that. At that time she lived with her parents because she was so riddled with student debt and she couldn't afford a place of her own. She liked dating frat boys and was dating a man who had a serious alcohol problem. Funny how social worker's lives aren't perfect either. I remember him showing me her Facebook page and remember what she looked like. Well it didn't occur to me until after the first visit that this is the same woman handling my case now!!
I don't know if this is good, bad or neither. Eugene and my relationship ended with him angry, telling me to lose his number because I had contact with Jared. I asked her point blank if she was Eugene's friend yesterday just to make sure, and she said, "yes." My husband said I made things really awkward by asking her, oops! Is this a conflict of interest? I think so...is there anything I can do about it? Unsure. What I do know is that this is the same women who arbitrarily gave Eugene's druggie cousin "another chance because I liked her." There is also no confidentiality when it comes to CPS investigations, so I know Eugene knows what's happening. He may even know more than I do about what their plans are...This whole situation has me very uncomfortable.
Anyway, yesterday the police officer/detective/school liaison officer/truancy officer/whoever the hell she is couldn't make it. Laura called me and told me this and wanted to come earlier than 3:00, she wanted to come at 1:30, I said okay. She came and wanted to talk to the rest of the children. I had the recorder on in the room she was to talk to them, but I couldn't really make much of the conversation out unfortunately. She talked to each one for about 15-20 minutes each. After she was done she came back out into the living room and was very friendly, but they're trained to be that way. She said she was going to order a urine analysis. The UA person would show up unannounced for a urine sample. Laura said that she didn't suspect we would need to do it more than once or twice...a month. Why did she add that last part in, we will have to do this every month??? For how long? We are clean!
She asked if I'm homescooling now (after I took them out of school, I was letting them take a break to be deschooled for a while, but that was highly frowned upon) and I said yes. She asked if I was using the lock box they gave me for my medication and I am. She asked Jared if he was taking my pills and he's not, and she mentioned pill counts in the future. I gave her my log of all my activities concerning the care and education of my kids and she thanked me and said it was very helpful. Then she left.
It would be a very cruel trick to take my children away now, as she gave the impression that we're keeping them. When we were discussing the details of the urinalysis, she even said she gave us choice of either going down to the lab, or having them come to us, and agreed it would be better for them to come to us, "because you have kids, and it might be more convenient."
After she left, I asked the kids what she asked them. It seems that she made a lot of small talk. She asked Naomi these questions: If we smoke (yes), and what kind of cigarettes do we smoke (the normal kind). If we drink, what do we drink (beer), when do we drink (she said it's random), do we spank (yes), how often do I spank them (only when we're really naughty, like when we write on the walls), Naomi told us that she mentioned a scary night but didn't want to talk about it. I can just imagine how that could be construed.
For Chloe she asked pretty much the same questions, Chloe said that she told the social worker that I spank her on the back because she was too embarrassed to say the word "butt." I just want to say that spanking with the hand on the butt is legal in Wisconsin, and I don't want to get into a debate over whether or not I should. I do it very rarely.
Priscilla wouldn't talk about her conversation. She just wanted to be silly lol.
After she was gone we went outside and enjoyed the gorgeous weather! Finally! Spring!!
So is this a sigh of relief? Yes and no. I wish my husband and I would agree on our tactics here. What to expect from here on out, and what will happen as a result of the conversation she had with my kids? Unsure. There are many unknowns right now. All I know is I still have my kids, and am very grateful for it. Thanks to everyone for the love and support. If you're just reading about my situation now, and would like to catch up, here are my other articles:
It's happening
Still Together
My Actions Concerning CPS
Police and Social Worker Coming Today
Love, snowpea ❤
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