Gonna be way up front and say this has not been a good morning.
I struggle with a lot of things and a lot of stuff is flaring up right now. But, despite that, I decided to move forward with life and do my daily warmup with the Daily 5 minute free write hosted by @mariannewest. It was a challenge, for sure, and there were a great number of frustrations along the way. A big one being Youtube throwing up a commercial in the middle of my set of songs I use to get focused as I write. Three minutes into an amazing write and suddenly the magic that was that moment, popped like a soap bubble on a kids finger for a product I will never buy and could care less about.
But I was able to regain at least a bit of my composure and, after resetting the time on The worlds most dangerous writing app I wrote this. It's not cheerful, nor I think hopeful, and I leave the ending up to you.
Yesterday.
The past. The who I was. The things that happened and are now set in stone on the track that is my life.
What is Yesterday? Wasn't it the today of that time? Why does yesterday hold so much sway over today? It is a question that plagues me. Like a stone in my shoe. What choices have been made, what actions have been taken, what events occured.
My mind dwells, a worm in the fertile soil of possibilities. Yesterday seems to dictate today, which in turn moves the pieces that make up tomorrow.
Why do I think so much about Yesterday?
A pox upon my today. An ever-present hum as I go about my day. For some Yesterday is another stone in the foundation of their castle. For others, it weighs down the bag that they feel trapped in, sliding deeper and deeper into the fast flowing river that people call life.
Yesterday to me, happened. Today, is happening. Tomorrow is what may happen. But, because the way my Yesterday was, I don't feel like today will be any different, and, in turn my tomorrow will be the same.
How does one turn Yesterday into a memory, and not a daily companion
That sits beside you whispering those awful words into your ear. How does one slay history and look to the future? How does one take the Y out of Yesterday and turn it into yesterday.
The emphasis in my life is sharp. And I fight to change it. David against Goliath. Who am I?
Thank you for stopping by to read this.
I'd love to hear what you think. Even on the bad days I'm trying to get better at what I do in hopes that it will lead somewhere, anywhere. The little engine I could, I hope to someday reach a pass so that I can move onwards.
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