Notes From an Amateur Writer #19

Typewriter

This is day 27 for me (I started 1 day late) in @dragosroua's 30 day writing challenge.

1. Coffee

I used to drink too much coffee. Once upon a time I didn't think the scale indicating coffee consumption went that high. But now I think it does. At the very least it does for me. For a while I even stopped altogether. It took me several months of weaning myself off by making awful instant coffee and lowering the amount in each cup until I could go more than one day without one. I did try cold turkey but the mid afternoon headaches were bordering on migraine territory. The need for a dark quiet room, the inability to function, and the eventual reliance on pain killers told me explicitly that I was drinking too much, and that cutting back was probably wise.

I eventually went several weeks without any coffee. I wanted to take back control. I wanted the ability to make the choice again. But I did miss having a drink. So now I have the occasional coffee. I take my Kindle with me and read at one of the local cafes. And my drink of choice is a long black.

The long black isn't a complicated coffee to make. Coffee, water. As the name would indicate there is more in it than a short black. And there is no milk, which is probably clear from the word black being in its description.

And yet I have run into regular trouble with this simple order of mine. Once a waiter brought out a jug of milk with my coffee.

"What is that for?" I asked him

"In case you want some milk with your coffee, sir."

"But it's a long black."

"Yes," he replied.

"If I put milk in it it will cease to be black. Why wouldn't I just order a flat white?"

"So you don't want it?" he asked me.

"No."

I thought this is just what happens when non-coffee drinkers serve up your coffee and moved on. Then I went to another cafe. I have been there several times, and no problems. Until the day my coffee arrived half empty.

"What's this?" I enquired. I knew what it was – a short black – but I wasn't sure they knew that.

"Something wrong with your coffee?"

"Where's the rest of it?"

"What do you mean?"

"There is only half a cup of coffee in there. A long black is a full cup."

"Oh, so sorry. We have a new barista here and they do things differently. Next time let us know you want a full cup."

Wait, so now I have to teach a barista how to make a standard cup of coffee? I need coffee just to get me through the stress of ordering my morning cup of coffee. It's enough to make you want to quit. For real this time. Except I didn't. I went back for more. Coffee drinkers are too stubborn for their own good. On the next visit my coffee arrived with a small jug of hot water. My cup was full. Success at last. But why the extra water? Why would I want to water down my coffee?

"What's that for?" I asked.

"Extra water, for your coffee." The cup was full, now they were over compensating.

"But I have my long black here," I said pointing to the coffee they had brought out. "Why would I need more?" Have I confused their new barista? Or made her nervous? Now I am nervous.

I need a coffee.

2. Crooked God Machine

I'm reading a book titled Crooked God Machine, by Autumn Christian ( @snowmachine ). There is a lot I could say about this book, and why I love it, and I probably will in a future post, but I wanted to quote something I read from it today. Through all the distraction with the coffee, this section stood out to me:

"We're all making this world worse than it needs to be," I said. "God hates us. He even hates his own prophets. He sends plague machines to kill us and hell shuttles to take us away. And what do we do? We become serial killers and madmen. We turn each other into slaves. We cut ourselves off from love. We destroy each other better than God ever could."

Something about this just spoke to me, profoundly. But more than this, something about the author's writing is changing me as a writer. The style is unique, and the voice is strong, and yet vulnerable all at the same time. A mix of the two. And the book itself with its biblical themes is right down my alley.

3. A Visit From Freud

I wanted to make a post about what I am reading at the moment. Talk about the books in more detail than I will here with this ramble. And perhaps I will in due time. As I was jotting down some notes to remind myself what it is I wanted to put in today's Notes, I inadvertently wrote 'reading lust', instead of 'reading list'. I could hear the Freud compartment of my subconscious going into overdrive.

"Something you wish to discuss?" I could hear the goateed man say from the chair located behind my eyes.

"No, it was a simple spelling error."

"No such thing," he told me.

"Wasn't it you who once said 'sometimes a cigar is just a cigar'?"

"Yeh, but I didn't lust after it."

"Keep telling yourself that, cigar man."

He stopped speaking to me, and I returned to my reading lust.

4. The Weather

I walked home from the cafe. From my conversations, both bizarre and trivial. From nervous baristas to inner Freuds, it seemed my time was up. The weather was cold. Extra cold. Cold weather annoys me. Like baristas annoy me. I try to get my annoyances over and done with by the middle of the day. So far it seemed I was on track.

It made me think of the weather girls on the TV. Is that why they are so cheery? With their skinny frames and fake smiles? To make us forget about how miserable the weather is making us? I wonder what would happen if some grumpy dude walked out on the set and said "It's goddamn cold today. Probably the same tomorrow. So stop your whinging. What do you expect, it's winter." I would probably start watching TV again if that happened.

5. Missing Cat

I passed a 'missing cat' sign that someone had stuck to a pole. I had seen it before and thought nothing of it. The sign that is, not the cat. Maybe I have seen the cat and didn't realise it was the same one. Would someone then put up a sign of my picture, with the words, 'Have you seen this person? He has seen my cat but doesn't realise.'

It made me think of the missing cat. Does he know he is missing? Perhaps he got bored of being a cat. Maybe he wants to be human. There are probably people out there who want to be cats. Is there a business opportunity there for some tech guru someday in the future?

"Be a cat for a day," the salesman tells me on the TV. I'm watching it again. The grumpy weather man is on and I don't want to miss his charms. But this ad has intrigued me. Do I want to be a cat for a day?

"Hello, I am curious about your cat for a day service?"

"Sure thing," the friendly female voice responds over the phone. "I can send you some information."

"OK," I respond. "Is it just for a day, or for longer?"

"It's generally for the day. If you want the week then that would be our deluxe package."

"I'll think about it," I tell her. She meowed as she hung up the phone. Or maybe she said goodbye. I'm not really sure.

All images used with permission, and sourced from Unsplash.com.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. If you liked it then please like, comment, and follow

@naquoya

Short Fiction:

Bang Bang You're Dead
I Have No Name and I Must Scream
The Last Book Store
The Judge
The Man In The Mirror
The End of the World [Part 1] [Part 2]
The Locked Room
The Gods of Love and War [Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3]

Notes From an Amateur Writer blog series:

Notes From an Amateur Writer #19 - Telling Stories

@naquoya