Dear Steemians,
This past weekend was quite a harrowing experience for me as a dad. I'm not sure if you got the reference of my title. It comes from an episode of Young Sheldon, a show on CBS, based on the young life of The Big Bang Theory's genius Sheldon Cooper. Sheldon is bullied by another kid and the parents have absolutely no clue as to how to handle the situation.
I was in a very similar situation. I just had no idea how to handle the situation. I don't even think this situation is episode-worthy, but a lot of minute fiascos that just end up blowing up, resulting in my losing my cool towards my child. Not cool, but I guess I have my flaws. It's somewhat hypocritical, but I always expect a flaw-less son. I sometimes forget the fact that he is a child, prone to make the mistakes that every human being makes, and critique him for every mistake that he makes. It's always been a motto for me that the best way to learn is to make the mistakes. Guess thought and action are at odds so much of the time.
I wonder if its the fact that I spend so much time at work, and don't get too much alone time to decompress and just get everything out of my system, but at times, I am on edge at home. I can't seem to think I am the only one out there. I wonder how other mom and dads rightly balances everything so that their children can grow up in a loving atmosphere.
So, I guess enough with the background information. What happened was ...
The Morning
The day started with my children waking up way too early and asking to watch TV. They didn't just calmly walk in the door, softly tap my shoulders while I was in bed, and quietly whisper, "Dad, I would like to watch some television". They shouted a war cry from their room, stomping all the way, jumped on the bed, and out of love, furthered to
Ok. So that image was a bit of an exaggeration, but you guys get the idea. So my morning started off in a world of hurt.
The Afternoon
We were fortunate to know a friend who worked with the US military in Korea. They have this huge base out in Yongsan, which really reminds me of the suburbs in the states, a small suburb in the smack middle of a huge city. It's really cool. We both brought our families to the military base and went to play in the playground.
Playgrounds nowadays in Korea are seldom to be seen. So even from a young age, all of the parents send their kids to study, and as a result, playgrounds have become somewhat of a ghost town in the middle of residential neighborhoods.
Anyways, the playground at the base is so cool. Not sure if I can share pictures, so I'll just play it safe and have everyone just imagine everything. Their playground is about the size of half a soccer field, two sets of swings, a mini rock-climbing volcano, and three stories of treehouse fun, all inclusive of multiple swirly slides. Even this super playground was deserted. Our four kids had half a soccer field to themselves. Initially, we thought, cool, we can relax somewhat on a bench and just chat, but boy was I wrong.
Already tired from waking up super early, I was already groggy, but my will to be a super dad prevailed, and I began to play with the children. HP at this point went from 80% to 40%. As all parents probably know, once your kids are playing with other kids for an extended period of time, they are bound to fight with each other. For the sake of illustration, I will just call them kids A, B, C, and D.
- Battle 1: "A" is on the swing. "B" starts pushing "A". "C" also wants to swing. "D" really doesn't care. "C" gets cranky and starts crying.
- Battle 2: "A", "B", "C", and "D" are all playing tag. They all start picking on one kid.
- Battle 3: There are only 2 bubble guns. "A" and "B" start playing with the bubble guns, but there are not enough to go around.
- Battle 4: After the bubble gun episode, "C" gets angry and goes back to the car and brings out a toy drone. Everyone starts oo-ing and ah-ing. Others want to play with it. "C" doesn't feel like sharing. The drone accidentally grazes upon "D". Fiasco abounds.
All of these battles began and ended within 2 hours. This is where I start losing my cool. You know, these things happen, in hindsight, but during the moment ... ... ..., you get caught up and just start shouting at your own kids, whether or not they did anything wrong.
The Evening
After dinner, we all went home, my HP level currently at like 5%. My kids wanted to continue playing; I wanted them to start washing up and get ready for bed. They wouldn't have it, and as you can guess, there was a bout of fits and tantrums. In the beginning, you try to reason with them, but as time passes, it just ultimately resorts to shouting. It's really amazing how so many parents are so patient with their kids.
I wonder what the secret is?
Chris
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