About six months ago, I was a total mess. I had financial burdens and kept blaming my husband for not being supportive and competent enough. To top it, I hardly took out time for my own self and placed that blame on my husband too. I basically lacked the ability to take accountability for my decisions. I had worked on it before and had improved at it about 2 years back, but being in a crisis somehow made me let go of that since I found it easier to put the blame on another person.
When I began working on improving my mindset and behavior, I realized that a major reason why I kept playing the blame game and felt so terrible was because I hardly did anything for my own well-being and seldom did I take out time for my own self. I was busy working to make money or doing household chores or taking care of my son. Don't get me wrong, playing with my son did bring me a lot of happiness, but when I am with him, it is not ideally the 'me-time' thing. At that point I realized the importance of taking care of and loving yourself and doing something for just yourself every day. That was the time when I did not even used to make a cup of tea for myself or breakfast only for myself. I used to eat when my son and husband had their breakfast/ lunch/ dinner and if neither of them wanted me to prepare a meal, I wouldn't make anything for myself as well because I found it silly just to get up and do something for only myself. Later I realized that it was this mindset that was increasing my stress levels.
When you stop taking care of yourself and doing things just for yourself, you feel that you are living only for others and while this can be a rewarding thought, it can also be very debilitating at times. So yeah, that feeling that I had NO life of my own was killing me from within and making me slip into depression. Luckily, I was mindful enough to realize that and identify that unhealthy behavior before it got way too late. So I slowly started to take out time for myself.
I began with going for walk 4 to 5 times a week for 20 minutes in the start and then slowly increased the time to 30 minutes when I got comfortable with the idea of doing brisk walk daily and found it easier to adjust this activity in my schedule. Slowly, I made more time for myself and took the decision of joining Steemit which is something I did solely for my own self and am just loving it. Third, I started cooking stuff for my own self. So now when I want a cup of coffee or a sausage and cheese sandwich at a time when my husband and son are asleep, I don't force myself to sleep too, but head to the kitchen and treat myself. A few days back, i made this delicious strawberry ice cream shake which was yummy. It was loaded with calories, but it's okay to treat yourself every once in a while (that once happens daily for me though) haha.
Ignoring that part, I am actually enjoying loving myself more every day and taking out time to just focus on my needs. Even if that time is not more than 60 minutes daily, doing things for my own self every single day make a huge difference in my life and emotional well-being. If you do not make time for yourself on a regular basis, I encourage you to start doing that now. Trust me, it will eliminate a lot of your routine stress and make you feel that you do live for yourself too. Do share your thoughts on the topic. Your comments really make my day.
Love and light,
Sharoon.
I am running a writing contest (that expires in 3 days) with 5SBD up for grabs for the winner so if any of you would like to participate in it, click on the following link:
Shary's Writing Prompt Contest #1
Here are some of my articles that may interest you:
How Positive Stereotypes can Make Life Difficult
Why is it so Hard to Apologize for Your Own Wrongdoings??
Confessions of a People Pleaser...
To Sleep or Not to Sleep, that is the Question....
Parents- Guiding Lights or Dictators?
One Smile and a Deep Breath to Quickly Fight Stress
Why I am Grateful for My Hardships...
Why Do We Attach Unnecessary Meaning to Everything??
Why is it Okay to Be a Little Selfish, Focus on Your Needs and Communicate them to Loved Ones
Batman & Jesus: Why do we fear debate?
My Scar Stories- Reminders of Many Different Memories
I am a part of the wonderful @ecotrain that aims to make this world a better place so do join it if that's your aim too..
