Stop Listening to People and Focus on Yourself

'My father used to say, "You would worry less about what people think if you knew how little they did".- Dr. Phil McGraw

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I have been a firm believer in not worrying about what people think of you or what you do and this lovely quote right up there just affirmed my belief in it. I am a sensitive person and as a child I was extremely sensitive too and as I discussed in an earlier post, I had turned into a people pleaser. It took me quite some time to improve on that unhealthy behavior. Today, I won't be talking about that, but about another behavior closely associated with it- worrying so much about what others think of you and what you do. Yes, often this worry comes from a need to please others, but it is also rooted in the need to conform to the rules set by the society and the fear that you may go through a slip-up if you don't listen to the people or that you may be banished by the society if you go against them or that people may not help you in difficult times if you don't listen to them.

Moreover, this worry also comes from a lack of self-belief and the feeling of incompetency. Personally, I believe all of these thoughts, fears and beliefs should not be given much importance and you should really just focus on doing what you want to do and do not pay any attention to what people think. And if that worry still perturbs you, just look at the work they are doing and honestly, you are quite likely to worry a lot less then.

Often, those who are constantly bickering about what you are doing are doing very little themselves. They aren't working hard for a better future; investing in themselves; going the extra mile to achieve their goals; and burning the midnight oil to achieve all that they aspire to have. Since they aren't doing much to be who they want to be and are quite likely not thinking outside the box too, they find it strange when someone else is doing that. For instance, when a person really close to me tells someone he aims to become a billionaire and that he is sure he will achieve this goal, his friends laugh at him and make fun of him. This used to dampen his spirits at first, but then I asked him to just look at what all those people are actually doing and most of them weren't actually doing meaningful things in their life. Fortunately, he is now more determined than ever to achieve his goal and does not give a rat's ass (his words :P) about what others think and that is helping him pursue his aspirations in a big way.

There are countless examples of accomplished people around us who worried less about what people thought of them and that was one of the many substantial keys that helped them achieve what they wanted. One of such examples that inspires me a lot is that of Elon Musk. He wanted to venture into the space travel industry and envisioned of doing things nobody had really imagined to do and that's what made a lot of people think he wouldn't be successful in doing those things. That did hurt him, but it did not lower his morale and he kept believing in himself and look where he is now.

Similarly, not many people thought that Colonel Sanders would be successful in having his own fried chicken joint and a successful recipe that would actually sell. After over one thousand and nine tries, he was finally able to achieve that success and there was no looking back for him then. Had he listened to the people who did not believe in him and those that kept trying to pull him down.

So you see turning a deaf ear to people often is the right thing to do and if you do that when you know you need to follow your heart and your goal, you can reach great heights of success. Not only financial success, but that does help you in living an overall happy and good life as well. For instance, a certain lifestyle is what suits me and my husband and a lot of my relatives do not agree with it, but I don't care about that at all. If I start doing that, it will get to my head and really destroy my piece of mind so I am just not concerned about that anymore. Also, I don't understand why people keep shoving their advice in the lives of others if they won't be there to support them. Families here in Pakistan keep forcing newly married couples to have children and when they do, they aren't there to help them out with the new responsibility.

I could go on and on about how the people here keep pulling you down, but I have a hungry tummy to feed (mine) and that of a little boy to feed too so I think I'll wrap up for now on the note that just look out for yourself. Oh do share your thoughts on the topic please. :)

Love and light,

Sharoon.

Here are some of my articles that may interest you:

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Why is it so Hard to Apologize for Your Own Wrongdoings??

Confessions of a People Pleaser...

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